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Grieving and struggling with BTD  This thread currently has 6,826 views. Print Print Thread
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Kristin
Friday, May 4, 2007, 2:38pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Kyosha Nim
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Beautiful photo Cathy,  thanks for sharing  


And it looks like a place of solace and comfort... very peaceful




The true meaning of life is to plant trees under whose shade you do not expect to sit.

- Nelson Henderson
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Cathy
Friday, May 4, 2007, 4:26pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Quoted Text
Posted by: Drea      Date Posted: Today, 10:35am

WOW. Something about that picture struck a deep chord with me. Huge emotions came welling up.


I cried a lot when I would look at this little statue....


Quoted Text
Posted by: Kristin      Date Posted: Today, 10:38am
Beautiful photo Cathy,  thanks for sharing  


And it looks like a place of solace and comfort... very peaceful


It is a very peaceful part of my yard.  When I am in the garden I can look west and see for miles since I live very high on a hill.  It is very peaceful.

Here is another picture.  It is the statue I just bought this week in memory of my other son, Joshua.

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Lola
Friday, May 4, 2007, 9:38pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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it s their place alright!
very nice!


''Just follow the book, don't look for magic fixes to get you off the hook. Do the work.'' Dr.D.'98
DNA mt/Haplo H; Y-chrom/J2(M172);ISTJ
The harder you are on yourself, the easier life will be on you!

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lola  -  Monday, May 7, 2007, 1:26am
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italybound
Sunday, May 6, 2007, 8:30pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Quoted from Cathy
I was able to get the testing done for $75 .


Cathy, what a tough time you have been having. I'm so sorry for all your losses. I can't imagine your pain (and your husband's). I am appalled that anyone would suggest in any way, shape or form, that you need to stop grieving and get on with your life!! You are the only one that knows when that is, tho it does seem that you are making some headway.     Someone once told me, we hurt as long as we want to. At first I was almost offended, but when I really thought about it, it made sense. We allow ourselves to hurt to stay connected. Only when we are ready to 'let go' do we start to heal. No one forgets their loved ones, but I'm glad you are starting to feel better. {{{{{HUGS TO YOU AND HUBBY }}}}}
Your nutritionist sounds awesome!! Lucky you  
Would you mind getting the name of this test from her. Thanks. I and my sister would like to have the test, but I want my NP involved to read the results and give us some suggestions on what to do. I dread to see what mine will show.........but as they say, knowledge is power.     Take care...........you are a strong gal.........I admire you..........you have come so far.  



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Cathy
Monday, May 7, 2007, 2:56am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Italybound, thank you for your encouraging words.  You are a blessing.

 The testing that my nutritionist uses is called Bioelectrodermal Response Technology.  This testing unites the fields of Naturaopathy, Homeopathy, Tradititonal Chinese medicine and Acupuncture with today's leading edge,  Bio-electrodermal response computer technology.  It is a system that facitlitates, as never before, clear communication between the body and the technician, enabling the bioenergetic fields of the body to be accurately measured and assessed.  This technique has been used in Europe for the past two decodes and is currently employed be thousands of physicians and technicians in both the United States and Europe.

 You may find someone out there where you are that uses this method.  It was quite intriguing what she was finding.  I know there were certain things ailling me I did not tell her....she found them and told me!  I was amazed!  She then put me on the detox using herbal tinctures.  It really helped me out to know what was ailing me physically.  The grieving sent my heath in a tailspin downward and I couldn't pull out of it on my own.  Now that I know It made it easier to be determined to really abide by the BTD.

I can let you know more about this technique if you are interested.
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italybound
Monday, May 7, 2007, 2:25pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Quoted from Cathy
 You may find someone out there where you are that uses this method.  It was quite intriguing what she was finding.  I know there were certain things ailling me I did not tell her....she found them and told me!  I was amazed!  She then put me on the detox using herbal tinctures.  It really helped me out to know what was ailing me physically.  The grieving sent my heath in a tailspin downward and I couldn't pull out of it on my own.  Now that I know It made it easier to be determined to really abide by the BTD.


This is exactly what I mean when I say knowledge is power........sometimes not knowing can drive ya nuts. When you know, you can take action

Quoted from Cathy
 I can let you know more about this technique if you are interested.


Yes, I would be interested. Thanks  



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Cathy
Monday, May 7, 2007, 3:35pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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I am typing this off a pamphlet that I received from my nutritionist.  

"Energy Fields and Healing

The physical body has an impressive intrinsic ability to heal itself.  However, when the body cannot complete the healing process on it's own, we are able as a result of this technology, to assist in strengthening the inherent healing capacity.  Through careful individual assessment obstacles are removed so as to enable the healing process to proceed.  The Bio-energetic testing measures resistance to a small electrical current delivered through a specific part of the body and is able to assess whether the electron-flow recorded against specific low voltage and amperage is indicative of optimum condition within that specific energy meridian (e.g. lung, heart, large intestine, etc.).  The Bio-energetic testing is then able to produce profiles showing clearly where there is need for adjustment to bring imbalances back to ideal readings.  The technology embodies vast computerized libraries of remedies to assist the return to maximum health of each unique patient.  From both modern and ancient perspectives we realize that every health problem is firstly an energetic phenomenon.  The Bio-energetic testing helps detect bio-chemical changes before they become full blown problems.  The Bio-energetic testing also indicates allergies and foods that are best suited to your specific bio-chemical makeup (what should be eliminated or added to your diet).

"Who Uses the Bio-energetic testing?

The bio-energetic testing is used by health practitioners including, but not limited to the following: Medical Doctors, Doctors of Osteopathy, Doctors of Homeopathy, Doctors of Naturopathy, Traditional Chinese Doctors, Dentists, Acupuncturists, and Chiropractic Doctors.

"Who Can Use This Service?

Anyone wanting to improve the quality of their health and life, or for more specific uses such as to enhance sports performance.  Tennis pro Martina Navratilova has used this approach as part of her overall health program under the direction of Dr. Whitcomb, M.D. in Colorado.

"How Does it Work?

The computer measures the degree of electrical resistance of the acupuncture points, generally the hands and feet.  These measurements indicate the balances or imbalances of the various organ systems of the body, and can detect low level reactions in the body.  It also indicates which nutritional or homeopathic remedy you will need and the exact potency that will bring about an energy balance.  Bio-energetic testing can also monitor the patient's progress.  There are no side or after-effects with proper use of the electro-diagnosis and therapy.  No piercing of the skin, on discomfort and no electrical impulses are felt during the testing.  The only clothing that must be removed are your shoes and any types of stockings.  No lotion can be used on hands of feet prior to testing.  No one with electronic heart devices, can be tested using this method.

"What Are the Benefits?

Bio-energetic testing shows any type of energy imbalance in your body and tests for vitamin-mineral deficiencies as will.  It takes the guesswork out of what your body needs and can tell you and your doctor more about the current state of your body's health.  It will indicate remedies for correction of any energy imbalances."

If you want or need to get in contact with my nurtitionist here is her email address: herbsforhealing@juno.com .

Now that I have had the detox it is far more easier to eat the bene foods to keep on a daily cleanse as Vicki told me earlier in this forum.  The grieving is easier to handle....it hasn't left, I am able to cope with it a lot better.  I talked with a older lady last evening I have known for many years, who had lost a teenage daughter and a baby when it was 5 months old.  Here she is in her 70's and she told me she has never gotten "over it".  
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italybound
Monday, May 7, 2007, 3:46pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Oh my gracious Cathy, that was so incredibly sweet of you to type all of that!! I will def be seeing if my NP does this. I want to get all the ICK out of me that I can.
Now see there, you're already helping others here.......  

I can see if I'm going to have this done......now is the time.........they are wanting to implant a defibrillator to keep my heart 'in check'. Of course, THAT will be the last course of action!
And no Cathy, I can't imagine that anyone ever 'gets over' losing a child. I just can't imagine that happening. You need to take all the time you need, but at the same try try to move forward. You are doing very well w/ that IMHO.
Yesterday, I watched an Oprah show where this lady's ex-husband killed their 4 children and then himself. She took a walk w/ a friend every morning at 6:30. He was apparently watching and went in and killed the kids as soon as she left. I have goosebumps in even typing that. These kids were prob about 15yrs to  4yrs.  How a parent does that to their (or anyone's for that matter) children, is totally beyond me. She said she had set a date at which she would make a decision to either go on or join her children. One of the shows she did, they found that she actually saved 16 people from committing suicide for the same reasons - having lost children. She is now remarried and has twin girls. She seems to be doing well, but it's been 5 years or more. I really admire this woman..........they said the ex left a note as to why he did what he did. She said she has never read it and she has no interest in anything he has to say. She has no pics of him w/ the kids anywhere in her home.........she said he doesnt deserve that right. And he doesn't. She still has pics of her kids on her refrig, but says as her girls grow, she will take down some of the pics of the other kids and put up new ones of the twins. She has great strength!! I seriously don't know how one would cope w/ something like that, but she did.
She made it in her own time and Cathy, so will you. In the meantime, you're helping others............you're a great gal!!!  




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lola  -  Monday, May 7, 2007, 3:58pm
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Cathy
Monday, May 7, 2007, 5:09pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Thank you Italybound, for sharing this story with me...it encourages me that I can go on in life.  I may need to "shift the weight" a bit now and then... but it's doable!  

My assistant pastor and wife was expecting their fourth child.  I did not find out about it until 2 Sunday's ago.  She was due in July.  Well she had to have an emergency C section because her blood presure sky rocketted!  It was a baby girl weighing only 1 pound 13 ounces...
Their 3 other children was showing every body that came to church last night the pictures of their new sister.  In the picture, you could see they put Daddy's wedding band on her arm as a bracelet...  Since I sing in the choir we were practicing a song to sing for Mother's day...the song was entitled, "As a Little Child".  I could not sing through the song I cried and cried.  I looked up and saw those precious little children gleefully showing every one these pictures and I said to myself, "I must be like these little children....they haven't a clue the seriousness of the danger their little sister health is in.  I must be the same way...be happy that I had the baby and "forget" the seriousness of losing him.  I know some precious day I will see my little babies with Jesus my Savior!  That is what keeps me going.
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italybound
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 2:30am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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{{{{{HUGS}}}}} and   to you Cathy.....it's obvious you have more strength than you know.  



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Cathy
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 11:28am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Thanks, italybound, for the hugs and encouragement.
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KimonoKat
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 2:02pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Cathy, with the health issues you've had, you really need to get your secretor status tested.  There are over 25+ foods that change from allowed to avoid for Type A's, when switching from the A secretor diet to the A nonnie diet.

Please consider it as a way to naturally detox your body.


Knowledge is power.  SWAMI gives you the diet that will unlock the key to better health, and it's all based on your unique individuality.
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Cathy
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 3:33pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Quoted from KimonoKat
Cathy, with the health issues you've had, you really need to get your secretor status tested.  There are over 25+ foods that change from allowed to avoid for Type A's, when switching from the A secretor diet to the A nonnie diet.

Please consider it as a way to naturally detox your body.


I agree very much so!  I am still battling the detox thing.  It is a daily task to cleanse myself inside and out.  I want to put my order in this week for the secretors test.....It will be soon.  I am getting very anxious to know what it is.  I've been treating myself as if I'm a secretor....you know, I may be wrong about that!

Thank you, KinonoKat, for showing concern.  Greatly appreciated.  
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Cathy
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 3:35pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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KimonoKat, can I order the test without using a credit card?  Can I order and be billed for it?
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italybound
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 4:21pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Kyosha Nim
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Quoted from Cathy
KimonoKat, can I order the test without using a credit card?  Can I order and be billed for it?


I think you'll have to use a credit card or send a check for it first. You can call NAP and ask them about it tho. 877-226-8973  



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Cathy
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 6:29pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Yes, I did call NAP.  I can send a check first.  That's good to know.  
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KimonoKat
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 7:24pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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If you have a debit card attached to your checking account, that will act like a credit card and you can use that.  I use my debit card with NAP all the time.


Knowledge is power.  SWAMI gives you the diet that will unlock the key to better health, and it's all based on your unique individuality.
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Drea
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 7:39pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Cathy, beautiful flowers! Purple is one of favorite colors...


It is not my responsibility to convince anyone of anything.
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italybound
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 7:56pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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Quoted from outdoordrea
Cathy, beautiful flowers! .


I was thinking the same thing..........those are one of my fav flowers, just wish they lasted longer.  



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Cathy
Tuesday, May 8, 2007, 8:05pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Thanks!  Purple is my favorite color, also.  
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Cathy
Thursday, May 10, 2007, 12:05pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Yesterday I had worked all day putting floral arrangements together for Mother's day.  A customer stopped by to chat with my suppervisor.  Blah, blah, blah, they went on.  They talked about their children and grandchildren and how long they hadn't seen their kids.  My supervisor said, "I hadn't seen my son since Easter."  I said to myself, "I haven't seen my son since Feb. 8, 2006."  (I don't say anything out loud, I keep it to myself and just listen).  I was then asked, "Are you a mother?"  I smiled and said, "Yes."  The customer then wished us both a Happy Mother's day.

 It is hard to not see your kids in a long time, I know.  It is hard when you don't hear from your kids...I know.

 I ordered my secretors test today.  I have purposed to eat less grain and breads and more veggies and fruit this week and am trying to get more than eight hours a sleep a day and I am feeling more energitic and refreshed.  I have been eating a lot of the beneficial foods and am feeling really good all the way around.  I even took a long walk the other day and felt much better afterwards.  I noticed that when I started I felt rushed, keyed up.  toward the the middle of the hike I felt uncomfortable physically, pain up under the right rib cage and pain in a lymphnode in my leg,  but I realized that my blood was circulating and getting the lymphatic system pumping to pump the toxins out.  By the time I got done my hike I felt really relaxed and comfortable emotionally.  I saw then how important it is for me to do the low stress exercise that Type A's are to do.
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Lola
Thursday, May 10, 2007, 3:11pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

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excellent!


''Just follow the book, don't look for magic fixes to get you off the hook. Do the work.'' Dr.D.'98
DNA mt/Haplo H; Y-chrom/J2(M172);ISTJ
The harder you are on yourself, the easier life will be on you!
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Cathy
Tuesday, May 15, 2007, 11:45am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Well, I got throught the holiday without being depressed and spacing out.  I'm so glad I kept busy at work.  Putting together the flower arrangements really helped.  I worked on Saturday and went to a Mother/Daughter banquet right after work.  There was a song that was sung called, "Cherish the Moments" by Ron Hamilton.  I cried through it.  (how embarrasing!).....  

A friend of mine who has 5 girls and lost a baby boy was sitting at the table beside me.  Her two youngest daughters both wanted to climb in my lap and cuddle up in my sweater.  They had to take turns...  I am so thankful for those two little girls filling the void that night.  I sure needed that!  God is good to meet the need.

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frumag
Tuesday, May 15, 2007, 12:38pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Cathy I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I think that it is the worsed that can happen to some one, the los of a child
I think what also could help you is not only to pray, but talk to G-d.
Tell how you feel, tell him every thing
last year during the Libanon war there were such scary times, that I tought "That's it"
Then I said to G-d "If you want me to go through this You have to hold my hand" And He did.
I called my friend and she was on the phone for me for 2 houres, that was "holding my hand"
take care of yourself
frume
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Cathy
Tuesday, May 15, 2007, 1:51pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Frume,  God is very faithful to be there for us, isn't He?  He has a very good listening ear.  Many a time I would be so overwhelmed with grieving that I would take my long walks and tell God how I feel.  He will bring back to my memory certain verses from His Bible and comfort me.  

I am trying many times to relax emotionally and go steady.  I do things that are fun, beautiful and lovely to do.

Thank you, Frume, for your encouragement today.  

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lola  -  Tuesday, May 15, 2007, 4:40pm
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