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The Bloody Family Vol 1  This thread currently has 25,974 views. Print Print Thread
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Brighid45
Friday, January 21, 2005, 5:12pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

INFJ
Kyosha Nim
Columnist and Bloggers
Posts: 5,192
Gender: Female
Location: southeastern Pennsylvania
Age: 55
Pumpkin in a can . . . who woulda thought it could be so good for ya?


Everyone is entitled to his or her informed opinion. --H. Ellison

Revision History (1 edits)
Brighid45  -  Friday, January 21, 2005, 5:12pm
typo
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azzap
Tuesday, January 25, 2005, 12:31pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
As the Bloody family jalopy made itís way back to the Bloody household, the discussion raged from conventional social behaviour to potential recipe ideas for the future.

B: I am absolutely disgusted to be associated with this family.
A: We didnít exactly ask to be lumbered with you either.
B: Thatís not what I mean smart guy. If it hadnít been for the fact that the supermarket was air-conditioned, we all would have been run out of town.
O: Yeh, Iím with B on this one. You guys stink. Iíve smelled dead rats that were more aromatic than you two.
AB: You can shout man, I could hear you letting go from the other side of the meat section.
O: Well, yes, there was that one. Had kind of a good note to it too donít you think?.
B: You see what I mean. Disgusting, the lot of you.
A: Oh, donít have a kiniption B, Iíll give it 2 hours at the most before that double chocolate cappuccino fudge icecream you had starts to make itself known to your body. And we all know what that means donít we gang? Remember that time B ate that whole tub of choc-choc-triplechoc-hazelnut-choc icecream and we werenít anywhere near a toilet.
AB: Yeh man, and they thought Krakatoa sent vibrations all around the world. That volcano had nothing on the B myster thatís for sure.
O,A, and AB, look at B and then fall about laughing.
B: Hey, whoís driving the car?
O: Oh yeh, forgot about that. Hehe. So, what shall we make for dinner tonight now that weíve got all these beneficial goodies of ours?
A: My thoughts go for a nice piece of grilled salmon, done on the barbecue, with some steamed broccoli, beet greens, a parsnip or two, with some cherries for dessert and a nice cup of green tea.
O: Iím with you on the salmon, but beet greens taste like crab grass and I wouldnít eat a parsnip if I was on my way to the chamber. Substitute that for some kale and donít forget the parsley. A few figs for dessert and if I have to, Iíll join you in a green tea.
AB: Nah nah nah man, salmonís too oily for me man, give me the snapper any day, some broccoli, collard greens and a nice piece of roasted garlic. Iíll skip dessert and just have a glass of water for afters.
B: Hmmmm, it would appear to me that our little plan of beneficial eating is somewhat limited by our inability to agree on a common base of sustenance, thereby leaving us with a dilemma of gastronomical proportions.
AB: What?
B: We canít agree on what to eat.
AB: Well why didnít you just say so man. I would have thought that was pretty obvious.
A: OK OK, itís not a total loss, we all agree that we can use the beneficials weíve got, itís just that we donít all like the same beneficials. No big deal. Weíre all individuals. Weíll just cook what each of us likes to eat.
O: Wow A, I donít think Iíve ever seen you handle anything so calmly. You even came up with a reasonable solution without having to resort to distillation.
A: You know, youíre right for once O, I do feel a lot calmer than usual. Maybe this BTD cortisol lowering caper is for real after all.
B: Well, whatever the case, I think we need to revisit the book and expand our list of beneficials to include the ones that apply to each of our blood types and not limit ourselves to the ones that are only good for all of us.
AB: Right on man. Tree.
B: What?
AB: Tree man
O: What the hell is space cadet talking about?
AB: For your information my somewhat less than conventional appearance and mannerisms do not belie the fact that a modicum of intelligence has been bestowed upon me by the creator and developed further by myself such that I am more aware than everyone else in this vehicle that we ARE ABOUT TO CRASH INTO A TREEEEEEE.
All: Aaaaaaaaaaararararararrrrrrrrrgggggghghhhhhhhhhh.
A: For crying out loud O, watch where youíre driving. You almost got us killed you lunatic.
O: Well, so much for the cool and calm A from a couple of minutes ago. Howís those cortisol levels now toots?
A: I think Iíll lower them by bashing you with a shovel when we get home.
B: If we get home. And if we do, Iíll help you.
AB: Whoís a space cadet now man?
B: Oooh, you better step on the gas O, I need to get home and fast.
AB: Just do as the lady says O, just do as the lady says.



The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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Chanur
Tuesday, January 25, 2005, 10:44pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

SWAMI'd from GT3 to GT6
Ee Dan
Posts: 845
Gender: Female
Location: Pacific NW, USA
Once again, AzzaP, THANK YOU!  
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Debra+
Wednesday, January 26, 2005, 2:52am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Eat BTD...Healthy Body... Happier Soul 'Gatherer'
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 5,812
Gender: Female
Location: Kirkland Lake, Northern Ontario, Canada
Age: 57
azzap- a friend of mine is an "O" and would love this. †She eats her wheat just so that she can toot. †I've tried to tell her not to eat it, but she does not listen. †Last summer we were in her car, talking in my driveway, when she let one go.   Automatic doors and windows which she kept locking on me when I tried to escape. †Not funny, although she was laughing hysterically. †I will have to print this story out for her. †I sure hope it works as she does not realize what she is doing to her body. †

Looooovvvveee the stories. †Keep them coming.  

Debra


"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung"

O+nonT

CBP (Certified BodyTalk Practitioner)
Mindscape (remote/distant healing)
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Accunect Practitioner...in training to teach Self-Care
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azzap
Thursday, January 27, 2005, 12:21pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
The morning sun beams into the Bloody household and bathes the home in a sleepy warmth. All is quiet in the house except for one individual who is in deep concentration on a new task.

A: Plink plunk plank plonk, plonk plink plank plunk.
O: (rising from bed) what is that god awful noise coming from the lounge room?
B: (also rising) Iím not sure but what ever it is it sure sounds bad.
A: Plank, plonk, plunk plink.
AB: (rubbing sleep from his eyes) Whatís all the commotion dudes?
O: I think A is strangling a cat.
AB Oh wow A, is that a guitar man?
A: No, itís a bass drum but if you use your imagination it can be anything you want it to be. Plink, plonk plunk plank.
O: Well it might as well be a bass drum the way youíre playing it. That sounds awful.
B: Hey, give the girl a break O, I donít see you playing any instruments.
O: Whoís got the time, besides, whatís driven you to start learning guitar now A?
A: Well, I was going through the book last night and was looking at the lifestyle strategies for my type, and at the top of the list it says to cultivate creativity and expression in your life. So this is how Iím doing it.
O: Yeh, well it also says to chew your food slowly to improve your digestion and I didnít see you doing that last night. I was considering renaming you ďvacuum cleanerĒ the way the food disappeared from your plate.
A: I canít help it, I just love steamed veggies.
O: You are a veggie, now take that infernal racket outside so we can eat breakfast in peace.
A: (walking outside) you just donít appreciate the finer arts you Neanderthal. Plank, plonk, plink, plunk.
AB: Far out man, everyone is so grouchy and unfriendly around here this morning man, why canít we all just accept each otherís desires man and embrace the beauty of the individual to express themselves to the world man.
O and B: Shutup
AB: Heavy. I think itís time I split this aggressive competitive scene man and chill out with some ohms man. In fact man, after breakfast, Iím going to meditate and then head over to the community hall and see whatís happening over there. Iíve got to spread my love to the world baby.
O: Be careful you donít spread it too far dude, you might catch something.
B: Sooooo, whatís for breakfast monkey man?
O: Weíve still got a couple of eggs left from ďthe big fridge cleanoutĒ so Iím going to make myself an omelette with some sautťed onions, a bit of chopped kale and maybe a spice or two to give it some zing.
B: Sounds good. Iíve got a hankering for another piece of fish. I need to get my protein intake up and I figure a good chunk of fish should do the trick. Donít know that Iíd like to have it every morning so Iíll work on ways to substitute something else, maybe some lamb. Iím finding that if I start to get tired, a little bit of protein does the job of picking me back up again.
O: Blimey, havenít you changed. In days of old youíd go straight for the can of coke. Are you sure some aliens didnít come along and replace the real B with you.
B: The only alien around here is you brother. There are times Iím sure you come from another planet.
A: (walking back into room), plank plunk plonk plink.
O: And having to listen to that, I wish I was on another planet. Man thatís awful.
A : Iíll have you know I did very well in music class at school and itís only a matter of time before I master this instrument. The teacher even said if it hadnít been for the extreme stage fright I would have got an A+.
O: The only A+ youíll ever get is your blood type, Iím outta here.
B: Donít listen to him A, I now youíll get the hang of it.
A: (excitedly) do you want to hear the song Iíve been working on?
B: Of course, go ahead.
A: Plink, plonk, plunk plank, plunk, plonk plank plink.
B: (trying to hide a grimace) beautiful, just beautiful.



The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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Lola
Friday, January 28, 2005, 2:07am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

GT1; L (a-b-); (se); PROP-T; NN
Sa Bon Nim
Admin & Columnist
Posts: 51,160
Gender: Female
Location: ''eternal spring'' Cuernavaca - Mex.
Age: 57
azzap,
you are amazing!!!  lol


''Just follow the book, don't look for magic fixes to get you off the hook. Do the work.'' Dr.D.'98
DNA mt/Haplo H; Y-chrom/J2(M172);ISTJ
The harder you are on yourself, the easier life will be on you!
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Alia Vo
Friday, January 28, 2005, 2:22am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Kyosha Nim
Posts: 3,640
Gender: Female
Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota
Age: 43
azzap,

Thanks for another episode.

You are quite the storyteller!


Alia


Alia A. Vo
A Positive Secretor
Minneapolis, Minnesota
BTD Lifestyle Since 1999
John 17
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Wulf
Friday, January 28, 2005, 2:35am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Taswolf in a previous existence
Kyosha Nim
Administrator & Blogger
Posts: 1,707
Gender: Male
Location: Tasmania
Age: 61
Quoted Text
AB: Heavy. I think itís time I split this aggressive competitive scene man and chill out with some ohms man. In fact man, after breakfast, Iím going to meditate and then head over to the community hall and see whatís happening over there. Iíve got to spread my love to the world baby.


Hey man, Is this AB type actually Neil from the Young Ones. ?

Paul
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ISA-MANUELA
Friday, January 28, 2005, 9:38am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
Guest User
eh- guys and gals......

what's about- if this may be the real truth and that we are really able to act as alike
and thats is us, who are making the world's ongoings with our loves!!!!!!      


Take care you all, Azzapchen was right in his fears- we will rule the world (perhaps only with our lovely  being?! )

Dont' you think that all great gurujis may have been AB's?  
and it takes some days... palim-palim than I am a believer................

jaooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuu the Beatles are back!!!!!!!
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azzap
Monday, January 31, 2005, 12:03pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
The next day.

A: Plink plank plunk plonk plonk plank plink plunk
B: (foaming at the mouth) If you donít shut up playing that thing Iím going to wrap it around your skull.
A: So what happened to ďbeautiful, just beautifulĒ
B: That went out the window once I realised you couldnít play anything else but plink bloody plonk.
A: OK, OK, I get the hint. But all great artists started off like this. You just watch, one day man, one day.
B: Hopefully by then Iíll be deaf, thatís if my rising cortisol levels donít bring on a heart attack first. O was on the right track when he bailed out yesterday. I gotta get out of here.

As if in answer to Bís despair a driving beat could be faintly heard on the wind, slowly getting louder as it got closer. Soon the words started to make themselves heard.

ďBorn to be wiiiiiildÖ..Born to be wiiiiiiiildÖ..get your motor runningÖÖ.get out on the highwayÖÖĒ, Bís pulse started racing, and her toes started tapping.

The noise grew to a deafening roar, only just audible however over the crashing crescendo of a thumping motorcycle engine. An unknown figure rode up, dressed all in black and sporting a tattoo across her naked midriff that said ďBorn To HikeĒ. The bike came to a skidding stop.

Linda: Hiya troops, Iím Linda Wells, which one of you is B?
B: Pick me, pick me.
Linda: My good friend (and yours) Kristen sent me over to give you a true taste of freedom baby. Grab that helmet and hop on.
B: Where are we going?
Linda: Who cares, lifeís about being spontaneous isnít it?. Weíve got a bag full of peanut butter sandwiches, on essene bread of course, a trail mix of walnuts, pecans, brazil nuts and dried figs, a flask of green tea, and just so everyone doesnít think weíre a bunch of wimps, a few beers to boot (looks at reader, ďremember, if you drink and drive, youíre a bloody idiot)
B: Woohoo, letís hit the road.
Linda: Just a sec, I see that A over there is holding a guitar. Do you like music A?
A: Yes, very much, Iím just learning to play.
Linda: Well, I do a bit of singing myself on the odd occasion, so if youíd like to get together we can have a ďjamĒ.
B: (whispering) you do not want to do that.
Linda: Huh?, hereís a few music books that I carry around with me just in case. Go your hardest.
A: Thanks Linda, Iíll start practising right away.
Linda: Why donít you give us a demo.
B: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!
A: SureÖplink plonk plunk plank
Linda: YesÖÖ.wellÖÖthereís obviously a few adjustments needed but as they say, practice makes perfect. See ya later kid.

As A walks back into the house, Linda and B roar off into the distance with the sounds of Steppenwolf blaring on the wind. Just then O and AB come up the driveway.

AB: Cool music man, who was that?
A: That was Linda Wells, the coolest woman I know. She says she wants to jam with me.
O: Then she must be the nuttiest woman I know. Or tone deaf, or both.
A: I refuse to get stressed about your remarks. Iím going inside to meditate.
AB: Hey, wait up sis, Iíll join you.
O: (muttering to himself) damned tree hugging hippies, Howís a bloke supposed to get anything done around here when heís constantly stepping over a bunch of cross legged, ohm chanting, insence sniffing mung beans. Gotta admit though, some of that insence smells nice. But I digress, damned tree hugging hippies. Whereís a good punching bag when you need one?. Oh well, this might give me the chance to do some of that planning Iíve been meaning to do for so long now. What was it I read somewhere? Oh yeh, ďplan your work, and then work your planĒ. Sounds good to me.

With the house aromatically quiet, O sat down in the lounge room and set about developing his goals and tasks for the year ahead. It was a task that proved to be more challenging than he first thought.


The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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Debra+
Tuesday, February 1, 2005, 2:37am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Eat BTD...Healthy Body... Happier Soul 'Gatherer'
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 5,812
Gender: Female
Location: Kirkland Lake, Northern Ontario, Canada
Age: 57
Speaking of lists, where is mine?  

Debra


"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung"

O+nonT

CBP (Certified BodyTalk Practitioner)
Mindscape (remote/distant healing)
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Accunect Practitioner...in training to teach Self-Care
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azzap
Thursday, February 3, 2005, 1:17pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
O: Righto you lot, itís time we had another Bloody family meeting.
A: Ten four that good buddy, Iíll get the essentials.
B: Ten four that?, so youíve turned into a trucker now have you?
A: Well, if you can be a biker, I can be a trucker.
B: Spare me.
AB: So whatís the meeting about man?
O: Well guys, last night I laboured over my goals for the coming year and do you know what I discovered?
AB: You discovered that the meaning of all life is to love everybody equally and to gravitate towards a state of oneness such that all humanity shares the burdens and responsibilities of all life and matter in the universe?
O: Errrr no, I discovered that I came up with diddly squat when it comes to setting goals. I have no goals!. Iím goal-less, I am a point of reference in the present without anything to aim for in the future.
AB: Itís better to live in the present man.
O: Shutup.
A: Well your first goal could be to stop telling AB to shutup.
O: Possibly, but my being goal-less made me realise that none of us has really ever set any goals in life, and so this meeting is about doing just that.
B: Speak for yourself oh great leader, I happen to enjoy not having a set routine.
O: Ah, but thatís just it see, you could set yourself a goal to actually BE more spontaneous, which I gotta admit is not the greatest example in your case, but you get what I mean donít you?. You could set a goal to practice more visualisation in your life.
B: Yeh, I get it, and A could set a goal to actually learn how to play the guitar instead of murdering it like she does now.
A (pokes tongue out)
O: No arguments from me there. But a more appropriate goal might be to establish a consistent daily schedule. And I donít mean consistently getting out of bed late.
A: Who sayís I get out of bed late?. So I lay around a bit before I actually get out but at least Iím awake.
AB: Thatís a subjective opinion.
A: Oh, wise guy eh, well if any one us should be setting goals itís you my dear AB. Let me see, new yearís resolution for 1999, practice more yoga. Remember that? I do believe the plastic wrap is still on those books you bought.
AB: Hey man, I need to make my lifestyle changes gradually man, rather than trying to tackle everything at once man.
A: Yeh, but 5 years. Thatís what I call gradual, veeeeeerry gradual.
AB: Canít rush these things you know!
O: OK, enough squabbling children. I propose we each spend the next week working on our goals for the coming year, and then weíll gather together again and see what weíve come up with. Agree?
A: Yep.
B: Nope.
AB: Maybe.
O: Right then, thatís settled. Now Iím off to the gym for a bit of an aerobic workout, who wants to join me?
B: Yep.
A: Nope.
AB: Maybe.
O: Well make up your mind soon, because Iím going in five minutes. Just gotta do a few pre-workout warm up exercises first. Iíll meet you in the car.
A: Man, that guy never stops. One day heís going to blow a valve Iím sure of it.
AB: Yeh man. He definitely needs to chill out more. Do you think we can convince him to meditate man?
A: Can you convince a tiger to become a vegetarian?
AB: Bummer.


The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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azzap
Sunday, February 6, 2005, 12:53pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
O and B have come home from the gym and while both of them are relaxing in the loungeroom, AB notices that B has a new pair of shoes.

AB: Hey B, groovy looking shoes man. Did you just buy them?.
B: Yeh, check it out, theyíre the latest thing. Theyíre made from the latest synthetic fibres with a new cross radial V-Cut flaggelated sole that will grip to anything like a vice.
AB: Oh, well Iím sorry to hear that.
B: Huh?, what do you mean?
AB: Well youíve just stepped in some doo doo man.
B: Oh godammit. SunnovaÖ..
O: I thought something smelled strange.
B hops off outside to clean off shoes.
A: Whatís wrong with B?, did she hurt her foot?
AB: Nah, just wasnít watching where she was walking man and vice-gripped something she didnít want to.
A: Whatever. Iíve got some news. I was down at the park plunking away on the guitar when this really cute guy came up and started talking with me, and he showed me how to play a few chords, and heís got these dreamy eyes, and he plays the guitar himself, and he follows the BTD, and I think Iím in lurve, and heís got Alopecia, and Ö..
O: Whoa take a breath before you pass out.
AB: Alopeciaís a breed of dog isnít it?
A: And heís just outside so do you want to meet him?
O: Do we have a choice?
A: No (hurries outside), everyone, Iíd like you to meet Mike Staffieri.
Mike: Hi there.
O, B(back from scraping off doo doo) and AB: Hi Mike, pleased to meet you.
AB: Whatís alopecia?
Mike: Well, it may have come to your attention that I donít appear to have any body hair.
O: I thought you were just going for the wall street trader look, or the gangster rapper look.
Mike: Not exactly. Alopecia is an autoimmune disease (interesting that I should be an O type as we are more prone to autoimmune diseases) where body hair falls off. Itís not painful or anything and there doesnít seem to be a cure.
AB: So itís not a breed of dog then?
Mike: Err no, although if it was, it would be a very expensive breed because itís quite rare in comparison to some other conditions.
O: How do you get it?
Mike: Donít know, it just happens. Iím sure that one day theyíll find a logical explanation to it, but for now youíve just got to accept that it happens.
B: Does being on the BTD help at all?
Mike: Not with the condition itself, I donít think anyway. I have noticed some new hair growth but nothing to write home about. For my overall health itís a godsend as you are most probably finding out yourselves.
O: Geez, I wish A and B had alopecia with the amount of hair they leave lying around the place. Sometimes I donít want to even look inside the bathroom sink. Eeewww.
Mike: Yeh, well it does have a few positives to it thatís for sure. I save a bucket load on shampoo and conditioner. On the other hand, women keep asking me if they can use my head for a mirror while they fix their makeup.
A: Really?
Mike: No, I was just kidding.
O: Sense of humour eh?. I like that. Youíll fit in well around here. It seems our A has taken a bit of a shine to you, no pun intended.
Mike: None taken, although Iím afraid that there is only one woman in my life at the moment and thatís my little girl back home. And right now sheíll be missing her daddy so I better get going.
A: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Mike: Iím sorry A, but she really needs me at the moment.
A: (wiping away tears but with a look of admiration in her eyes) What a guy!
AB: Has alopecia ever been a breed of dog man?
Mike: Tell you what, if I ever find out, youíll be the first person I tell.
AB: Thanks man, I appreciate that.
O: Hey Mike, can you take him with youÖ.pleaseÖ.?
Mike: I think he needs you guys more than me at the moment.
B: Címon mike, Iíll walk you to your car. I think A needs some time to herself.
All: Seeya Mike.
Mike: Seeya guys.
AB: Donít worry A, Iíve got just the thing to take your mind of your troubles man. Come with me and Iíll give you a nice aromatherapy massage to soothe away the pain. I think a mixture of chamomile for letting go, geranium for re-balancing and a touch of mandarin for happiness should do the trick.
A: Thanks AB (goes into the back room)
B: (coming back inside) What a nice guy he was. Look at this. He gave me a CD with a song he wrote. Itís called the BTD blues.
O: Put it on, a bit of music right now is just what the doctor ordered.

I wake up in the morningÖdaÖda.da.daÖda
Get my blue shorts onÖdaÖda.da.daÖda
Plop by butt straight onÖdaÖda.da.daÖda
Ride my wheels till the songs all doneÖdaÖda.da.daÖda

YeahhhhhÖI got the BTD Bluezz (long high pitched guitar riff)


The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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azzap
Monday, February 14, 2005, 12:02pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
A: Ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh, ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh
O: Wow, A sounds like sheís having a bit of hard time, whatís up?
AB: Well man, we sat down last night and centred our focus on the being within until the very escence of our souls aligned with the almighty cosmos and the cares and troubles of our material selves washed away from our spirits allowing us to reach oneness with the universe.
B: And?
AB: And then we proceeded to get as drunk as lords.
O: Why is it that I see a familiar theme replayed over and over again here?
AB: I dunno man, I guess itís always hard when you lose out in love, and therefore you fall back on what is comforting to you.
O: Lose out in love?, she knew the guy for less than half a day. Imagine if she actually had a long-term relationship. Sheíd be on a binge for a month.
B: Ooh, bad visual dude.
O: letís have some fun. Hey A, weíre having lambís brains for breakfast, want some?
A: Mmmmmph
O: Weíre also having some tripe to go with it.
A: Mmmmmmmmmmph.
B: Oh yeh, and donít forget the sheepís eyeballs for desert.
A: Raaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllppppphhhh.
AB: Man, you guys are just so cruelÖÖfunny, but cruel. Actually, Iím not exactly feeling so hot myself. Move over A, Iím coming through.
O: Well, Iíd say their day is just about ruined. What are you doing today?
B: Iím heading off to the community hall. There is a group there who are practicing visualization techniques and I thought it would be fun to join in. Why donít you come along too?
O: No, I donít think so. Whenever Iíve got too much time on my hands to think I always want to eat junk food. And I can just imagine me visualising a Mars bar or something like that instead of whatever the hell it is you would be visualising, which Iím sure would be a mountain or a completed crossword puzzle or something.
B: (punching O in the arm) So what are you going to do today then?
O: Well Iím figuring on starting the day with a healthy breakfast of fillet steak, pumpkin, broccoli and carrots, followed by an hour or so of working on my goals and plans for the year, then itís off to the gym for an hourís aerobic session with a nice protein shake chaser, and then on to lunch which will consist of a chicken salad splashed with olive oil, a post lunch afternoon snack of possibly another protein smoothie and then Iíve got to head to the store for some more supplies to make dinner with. What do you think of that for a dayís activities?
O: B?Ö.B?Ö.damn, must have gone to her visualisation class.
A: (coming out of toilet) Ooooooooohhhhhhhh, I am never drinking again.
O: At least not until next time huh?
A: Something like that. No, I mean it this time. Never again. How can something that gives you so much pleasure when you are doing it, cause you so much pain after you do it?
O: So you believe that getting yourself absolutely spastic and slurring your words is actually pleasure?. I knew there was something wrong with you.
A: No, you know what I mean, you get that nice warm fuzzy feeling going on and all of a sudden the world seems wonderful and nothing seems to bother you and then next thing, wham, youíre as crissed as a picket. Mmmmmmph, ooh go easy stomach!.
O: Ah yes, the good olí endorphin release followed by the carbohydrate based insulin spike, followed by the liver and kidney overload in combination with severe dehydration. I remember it well. I once got so drunk that I stripped naked and ran down the main street in the middle of the night.
A: I never heard about you doing that one. But big deal, lots of people have done that. Besides, it was dark and no one would have seen you anyway.
O: Not unless it was New Years Eve.
A: Oh. I see.
O: Exactly. Needless to say, we shall never talk of it again. Howís AB doing?
AB: (from toilet) Iím fiiinnnee.
O: You two really tied one on didnít you?
A: Letís just say that no one else will have any problems avoiding any alcohol in this house anymore. There isnít any.
O: Good, now, how about a nice plate of fried octopus tentacles?
A: Mmmmmmmmph.


The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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azzap
Wednesday, February 16, 2005, 1:01pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
As the Bloody family rests after a hectic morning there comes a knock on the door.

O: Iíll get it.
O opens the door to see a man dressed in a long black coat and wearing a 1950ís style hat. Next to him is a tall, muscular, intimidating, yet not so bright looking thug. The rest of the Bloody family are intrigued and gather behind O.

Don: Allow me to introduce myself. Iím Don DíAdamo and I hears youse has been running a racket in my town.
O: A racket?
Don: Oh, so youse admit it do youse?
A: What type of racket?
Don: Donít play coy with me sweet checks or Iíll get Louie Loose Lips here to work youse over.
AB: Why do they call you Louie Loose Lips man?
Louie: Iba donítba knowma manba
AB: Right!
O: Look, weíre really not sure what youíre talking about.
Don: So youse donít know nuttin about blood type eh?
B: Sure we know about blood type. Weíve been following the diet for a while nowÖwell, some of us a bit more than others (looks at A and AB)
A: It was just a little bit of alcohol.
O: Sure looked like a lot coming back out. Anyway, like B said, we know about it.
Don: Then youse will know dat the DíAdamo family has a monopoly on the blood racket in dis country.
A: DíAdamo family?, do you mean to tell me that Dr Peter DíAdamo is a gangster.
Don: Hey doll face, we donít mention the name of dat no good black sheep oí the family.
B: But heís a dedicated doctor whoís changed the lives of millions across the world with ground breaking research and information and well as treated hundreds for serious illness.
Don: Like I said, heís a fink. Our father would be rolliní in his grave.
AB: Er, pardon me for interrupting man, but his father is still alive and in fact, is still somewhat involved in the blood type process, particularly as he was the one who did the original observational research.
Don: Den whoís funeral was dat we went to all dem years ago Louie?
Louie: Iba donítba knowma manba
Don: Ya donít know much do ya Louie?
A: Are you sure youíre a member of the DíAdamo family?
Don: Listen here baby blue eyes, Iíll have you know the DíAdamo family is the biggest, baddest syndicate in theÖ..
Just then a fit and healthy looking woman dressed in running gear and puffing just slightly jogs up behind the gangsters.
Suzanne: Hello Reginald, hello Leonard, fancy seeing you here. I was just on my daily run up to the hill in the park when I saw you and thought Iíd come over and say hi.
Don: Who da hell are you lady?
Suzanne: Now now Reginald, you wouldnít be using that word if we were in bible class now would you? (looks over at the Bloody family and rolls eyes). And Leonard, I havenít seen you there in ages, make sure I see you there this week.
Louie: Yes Mrs Graham.
Don: Shutup Louie ya meathead.
Suzanne: Oh and whatís this, playing a little game of dress ups are we?. These two just love to put on shows for the others at the church. Theyíre such pranksters.
O: I think theyíre trying to be gangsters more like it.
Suzanne: Oh how rude of me, Iím Suzanne Graham, Iíve been following the blood type diet for a few years now, and I mention that only because I know that your family does too.
B: How did you find that out?
Suzanne: Why, our mutual friend Reginald here. Reginald works down at the supermarket and has seen you a couple of times buying foods for your type.
AB: I thought Iíd seen you somewhere before man. I just couldnít put my finger on it.
B: Olí Reginald, aka ďThe DonĒ and Leonard, or should we say Louie Loose Lips have just been trying to extort us and intimidate us by acting as gangsters from the DíAdamo crime syndicate.
Suzanne: Well heavens above (grabs both of them by the ears) you just come with me right now you two and weíll see what your parents have to say about extortion and intimidation. Thank you kind folks, Iíll see you around.
Don: Hey, get your hands off me lady, ya punk
Louie: We didnít mean it Mrs Graham, honest.
Don: Shutup ya meathead.
O: What a couple of losers. Had me going there for a while though.
A: Yeh well you never were a real bright one.
B: A few sandwiches short of the picnic I think itís called.
AB: A couple of sheep short in the top paddock as they say.
O: (looking menacingly at the rest) Letís see who can run the fastest shall we.



The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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Brighid45
Wednesday, February 16, 2005, 8:20pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

INFJ
Kyosha Nim
Columnist and Bloggers
Posts: 5,192
Gender: Female
Location: southeastern Pennsylvania
Age: 55
*laughing helplessly*

So the awful truth comes out at last . . . Dr. D is the black sheep of the family. That explains sooooo many things.



Excellent story Azzap! I'm loving every installment of the continuing saga


Everyone is entitled to his or her informed opinion. --H. Ellison
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ISA-MANUELA
Wednesday, February 16, 2005, 10:26pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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regards Isa

p.s.
azzap- einfach grossartig!!! Super-great- congrats.....
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Debra+
Wednesday, February 16, 2005, 10:53pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Eat BTD...Healthy Body... Happier Soul 'Gatherer'
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 5,812
Gender: Female
Location: Kirkland Lake, Northern Ontario, Canada
Age: 57
Just love it, love it, love it. † †

Debra


"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung"

O+nonT

CBP (Certified BodyTalk Practitioner)
Mindscape (remote/distant healing)
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Accunect Practitioner...in training to teach Self-Care
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RhodaMaria
Friday, February 18, 2005, 11:03am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Good grief Azzap!!  
You are awesome...

Are you planning to publish that fantastic story (to be continued!!) for us readers??
Now I have to cut and paste it into a document..

very inspiring you are, the D'Adamo Syndicate!!!
You are a creative spirit... that is for sure..

I just love your bloody stories ABOve all....!!!

Take care and stay well
Cocky  
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azzap
Friday, February 18, 2005, 1:32pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

======Gatherer====== Be Good To Your Mother
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 744
Gender: Male
Location: Maroochydore, Queensland, Australia
Age: 50
Aha, you thought this was another episode didn't you?. That's coming soon.

I just wanted to say that I really appreciate the comments from these episodes(stories) because they actually give me ideas for future stories. And I love to see people laughing.

Cocky: I was going to say that I'll send the word file to people if they want it but I just realised I would need to collect everyone's email address to do that and I'm not sure I have enough hours in the day at the moment, so I'm afraid you might have to resort to the ol' cut and paste routine for now if you are creating your own file. Maybe we can do that in the future if the number of pages of this thread become too long. I could send the word file to everyone so that they've got the episodes, and then we could start a new thread (Bloody family 2) where the other one left off.

What do you'all think.

Have fun everyone. Aaron.  


The only possessions which do not possess us are those which can be shared by all.

It also pays to wear a christmas hat.



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Dr. D
Friday, February 18, 2005, 1:42pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Peter D'Adamo
Kwan Jhang Nim
Posts: 4,150
Gender: Male
Location: Connecticut
Age: 58
Aaron,

If you only knew where I grew up...


A whole system is a living system is a learning system.’ -Stewart Brand
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RhodaMaria
Friday, February 18, 2005, 1:52pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Azzap,

Check the interview I had with that awesome member of the D'Adamo Syndicate Dr. D †(see my column BloodRelations!) and you will know where this Doc had his roots... †

That is great! The Bloody Family RELEASED... in book...

I will let you know my emailaddress, if needed.

Thanks for your awesome humor!!

Cocky

Revision History (1 edits)
Brighid45  -  Friday, February 18, 2005, 1:53pm
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Debra+
Monday, February 21, 2005, 12:16am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Eat BTD...Healthy Body... Happier Soul 'Gatherer'
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 5,812
Gender: Female
Location: Kirkland Lake, Northern Ontario, Canada
Age: 57
Oh azzap that was mean-no continuing episode, but great idea with the word file. † I have, actually, been cutting and pasting as you have been telling the story just in case something happened to it. †Have sent it to a few friends that I hope will take the hint for the diet.  

Keep them coming. †From one of your greatest reader fans.  

Debra


"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung"

O+nonT

CBP (Certified BodyTalk Practitioner)
Mindscape (remote/distant healing)
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Accunect Practitioner...in training to teach Self-Care
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ISA-MANUELA
Monday, February 21, 2005, 8:15am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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......ding-dong-dang-bšng........................
now the story of azzap- himeself......................













but where is he???? what-'s he doing- from where does he came from????








this will be another story hi-hi-hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii



but he lives nearby the waters with a famous view on it?-no? yea......

Revision History (1 edits)
Brighid45  -  Monday, February 21, 2005, 8:21am
Took out a few too many spaces
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RhodaMaria
Monday, February 21, 2005, 1:29pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
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Yesss, Isa you are right on!!

Now, the story of the Bold Bloody Vazzampire himself??

What are his whereABOuts, how does he get his bloody meats??
What does he drink??? †Bloody red wine, or killing still water???

Okay, Azzap, what more bloody clues do you need???? †

Incognito time is over!!!

Cocky

Revision History (1 edits)
Brighid45  -  Monday, February 21, 2005, 2:41pm
typozzzzzz.....
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