how are you doing on that med... till now, half of mine ....anything new.....

I'm sleeping better, and good sleep is a linchpin for me.  But I'm still very tired and sleeping a lot; catching up, I suppose, on lost time.

I'm trying again!

Quoted from My Toxic Workplace

It seems that on Friday of last week (11/19), I overlooked my Paxil when refilling my pill boxes (weekly).  For me, quitting Paxil outright induces a state of mild mania (i.e. hypomania)....

Re: the Paxil.  I didn't realize I hadn't been taking Paxil until Tuesday night--four days without it.  I had a prescription for Prozac, and was planning to use it to transition over to from the Paxil, so I went Wednesday morning and had it filled, and started taking it that day.  I really should have refilled my Paxil, too, but it was good to see clearly just how this stuff affects me.  I need to get away from it.  Now that I'm away from this job I have the opportunity to wean myself off.  I started back on the Paxil on Friday morning (total one week off of it), and today I felt zombified, robbed of motivation, and rather numb, but at least I wasn't an ill-tempered jerk.

Being drained of ambition isn't good, but neither is being manic, so this is going to require balance.  I hate this stuff.   It has done an excellent job treating my anxiety, but it clobbers my drive, ambition, emotions, and mental acuity.  When I try to quit, the withdrawal symptoms are much worse than the original ailment.  While I'm trying to quit, I'm going to be suffering from the worst of both sides.

As you see, I started taking the Paxil again (after the accidental break) on 11/26 at half the normal dose (5 mg), then the full dose (10 mg) Saturday 11/27.  Sunday night 11/28 I tapered down to 7.5 mg.  I'd been taking Prozac for five days.  I've read many success stories of people using Prozac to get off Paxil.  Prozac is an SSRI like Paxil, so it's supposed to affect the same neurotransmitter.  In case I decide I want to quit the Prozac too, it has a half-life of about 9 days, compared to Paxil at around 20 hours, so Prozac is much easier to quit, because it leaves the body much more slowly.

I'm trying to go three days at each dose before stepping down.  Tonight will be my last night at 7.5 mg.  Tomorrow I'll skip it because I'm going to move it to the morning, so I'll start taking 5 mg on Thursday morning.  Sunday morning I cut back to 2.5 mg, and Tuesday is my last dose.  Or that's the plan, anyway.

Wish me luck!  I expect it to go much better this time around.

Good luck TJ!!

Good luck, TJ!  

Good luck, TJ

TJ, Have you tried supplementation, i.e. taking vitamins/minerals/amino acids that affect dopamine or seratonin? I have been on Paxil before, as well as many other meds, and empathaize with what you're going through. The hard part should be over within days to a max of a few weeks, although lingering effects...longer. I can tell you that I have moved to instead supplement with l-tryptophan and l-tyrosine, and I have had better results than with any drugs. I have gotten different interpretations over the years, depression, anxiety, bi-polar. For me, I lean more to think I have BPD (borderline personality disorder), as it more resembles PTSD, and resonates for me. If the med helps you, that's great, I just thought I'd suggest supplementation first as it has helped me a lot! Best of luck!

remember please in and with what we are identifying....
and yep I observed much better and quicker results with amino acids then allopathic medication...in nearly all of my clients...
btw here the link of the canadian orthomoleculars' : http://www.orthomed.org
they cherrish a beautiful encyclopedia in biological-psychedelic treatments...

Thanks all, I'll keep you posted on progress.  I also changed my mind about moving to morning doses (recognizing the vital need for quality sleep), so I'm going down to 5 mg tonight instead of tomorrow morning.

TJ, have you ever had your thyroid checked (and with that your T3 and T4 hormone levels)? When I was depressed, they put me on zoloft, that made me so aggressive that I stopped after just a few days. But my therapist told me that most of her patients were two kinds... the one that have a thyroid problem and as such become depressed and the once that are depressed and also have a thyroid problem.

The first one (like I was) can be fixed fairly easily by getting the thyroid back working or at least getting enough T3 in you.

Yes, my thyroid is A-Ok.

Have you ever tried liquid ginseng?  

I haven't.  I have tried red Korean, and it made me feel too aggressive.  It was a big dose (648 mg) in a capsule, so I couldn't cut it in half.

The past two days have been rough, but I'm feeling a lot better today.  I think I just had too much Paxil and Prozac in my system all at once.  It seemed to me that they were making me feel more depressed rather than less, and I read yesterday that this often happens to people with bipolar disorder (paradoxical drug reactions).

I didn't take any Prozac yesterday or today, and I cut back to 2.5 mg of Paxil last night, after only taking 5 mg for one night (Wednesday).  I'm going to take 2.5 mg for a couple more nights, maybe through Sunday night, then quit, and if I need anything else I'll just take another Prozac (at night, this time).  If I continue having problems with anxiety I can probably get away with taking Prozac once per week, since it hangs around so long.

I'm fine with--actually happy with--taking medication for bipolar disorder, but I'd like to get to the bottom of my anxiety issues and learn how to cope with my anxiety without any extra meds.  Thanks for your support!

Last dose of Paxil tonight, then I'm going to take a dose of Prozac tomorrow night.  Next week will be telling.

Just read through this thread...

I'm very anti-pharmaceuticals. I can totally related to your talk with the Dr. I find medical Dr's some of the worse people in the world to try to communicate with. So I just stay as far from them as possible also.

I pray that you will be able to completely get off the meds and feel alive, happy and well. As for work, maybe it's a blessing right now that you are having a break. I don't know where you wrote this but you said you were thinking of moving? Are you still feeling like that? Maybe somewhere else there would be a better option for a healthy work environment.

I hope you start feeling better and better! *hugs*

Paxil-Free, Day One.  I took Prozac the past two nights to smooth the transition.  Today I'm feeling a little taste of mental clarity starting to emerge, as if I might be able to do more work that requires concentration without experiencing the usual amount of frustration and fatigue.  It's nothing drastic, just a taste, but promising.  The Prozac is probably blunting my mind and senses, but it seems less potent in that respect than the Paxil.  I'm not feeling anxiety, or the intensity that I got when stopping Paxil abruptly.  Already I can tell that I won't be content to sit in my apartment this week doing nothing.  I want to start in on my job hunt but feel reservations because this is just the first day off, and who knows what I'm going to be like tomorrow or next week?

Quoted from christaalyssaA+

I pray that you will be able to completely get off the meds and feel alive, happy and well. As for work, maybe it's a blessing right now that you are having a break. I don't know where you wrote this but you said you were thinking of moving? Are you still feeling like that?

Christa, I love the idea of getting off my medications at some point, but I'm not going to count on it happening.  Frankly, I love what the Lamictal does for me.  I don't want to stop taking it.  I didn't appreciate how much it helped me until I tried quitting.  It imparts such stability to my mental and emotional states.  It helps me like none of the other meds I've ever tried.  I have no problem with Topamax, either (other than expense).  No side effects, and no migraines since I started taking it.  I do want to move to Utah, but it's going to be ticklish to make it all work together.  If I can find a good job out there, things might just come together.  Thanks for asking!

Lamictal is what my sister's on, if I recall correctly.  Loves it.  

Also remember that as an Explorer you take longer to cycle any drugs out of your system. Not that this helps.

You're welcome.

Although you say you feel good on Lamical and want to stay on it, and being as anti-meds as I am. I am happy you are happy for now.

Just a thought... but what if at some point you can't get your meds? When the levies broke in New Orleans those people were without their meds for months. Those people went cold turkey on their meds cause they had no other choice. A lot of people died. With any drug, stimulant or addictive substance... going cold turkey is tough and difficult. Sorry... not to be a bummer, just sharing my thoughts on it.

I wouldn't personally want to ever be dependent on a drug to keep me feeling "balanced". I continually work every day on eating the right foods and taking the right vitamins and supplements to make sure I am balanced and healthy.

Quoted from TJ

I'm fine with--actually happy with--taking medication for bipolar disorder, but I'd like to get to the bottom of my anxiety issues and learn how to cope with my anxiety without any extra meds.  Thanks for your support!

Hey, hope you don't mind me asking TJ, but I was just wondering...if the last Dr you saw (the new one) said you were only borderline & re-diagnosed you as having a "mood disorder".... how come you are "happy taking medication for bipolar disorder", that you don't have?? & goodluck getting to the bottom of your anxiety issues... Love that you can share this stuff!!!

How are you feeling today TJ?

Christa- I think that all of us agree that the ideal is not to rely on any pharmaceuticals on a regular basis. But that may not be realistic for everybody. Some of us need to heal from decadess of eating wrong, and pharmaceuticals can sometimes provide balance until our bodies heal enough to stay balanced alone.

I'm not going to live my life in fear because "maybe someday there will be a natural disaster and I can't get my meds." I somehow doubt I'd be able to easily obtain BTD compliant food or supplements during a disaster either. During crises, we make due with what we have, and sometimes that means our bodies get damaged and it takes us a long time to heal once the crisis is over.

Quoted from Possum

Hey, hope you don't mind me asking TJ, but I was just wondering...if the last Dr you saw (the new one) said you were only borderline & re-diagnosed you as having a "mood disorder".... how come you are "happy taking medication for bipolar disorder", that you don't have??

In hindsight I realized that I was actually having a hypomanic episode when I went in to see that Dr.  So much for not being bipolar.

Quoted from christaalyssaA+

Just a thought... but what if at some point you can't get your meds? When the levies broke in New Orleans those people were without their meds for months.

What if I was type 1 diabetic?  Should I try to live without my insulin?  We are all dependent on lots of things: food, shelter, clothing, etc.  You could just as easily be deprived of one of those others.

Quoted from ruthiegirl

How are you feeling today TJ?

Great!  My body is still really out of shape from lounging around so much while I've been feeling crummy, but my mind and heart are ready to face the world again.

I saw my therapist yesterday, and she was very pleased with the progress I had made, and was encouraging of my hopes to move west.  I took a 20 mg Prozac again last night, and I'm feeling pretty    today.  I see the "Dr." (actually nurse practitioner) tomorrow for medication maintenance, and I'm going to ask for a 10 mg Prozac (hopefully that won't clobber me), and to increase the Lamictal to 200 mg.  Ideally, I will be completely off Prozac, too, by the time I titrate up to 200 mg of Lamictal.

More to come.

I know people say moving is one of the most stressful things in life, but you might find it invigorating.  I don't find moving very stressful.  I think it's kind of freeing.  You know, going through stuff, throwing things out, decluttering, relocating, unpacking and setting things back up.....Just make sure you're feeling manic when you do it all.  ( ---only someone who has similar issues can joke about it like this.  I chuckle because I understand!)