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BTD Forums    Diet and Nutrition    Eat Right 4 Your Type  ›  What would you do?
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 Should I stay home or go?
Yes, go. (21 votes)
91.30%
No, don't go. (2 votes)
8.70%
23 Votes Total Last vote Friday, May 24, 2013, 8:20pm by shoulderblade
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What would you do?  This thread currently has 4,219 views. Print Print Thread
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Debra+
Friday, August 19, 2011, 8:48pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Eat BTD...Healthy Body... Happier Soul 'Gatherer'
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 5,812
Gender: Female
Location: Kirkland Lake, Northern Ontario, Canada
Age: 57
Pretty well everyone who has been doing BTD/GTD has been through something like this "What would you do?" thread at one time or another.   I LOVE how this BTD/GTD family has the LOVE.  

I think everyone will agree this is a thread worth sticking.  Done.

Debra   

  


"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung"

O+nonT

CBP (Certified BodyTalk Practitioner)
Mindscape (remote/distant healing)
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Accunect Practitioner...in training to teach Self-Care

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Debra+  -  Friday, August 19, 2011, 8:49pm
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Easy E
Friday, August 19, 2011, 9:16pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Rh+ Explorer, non-secretor
Ee Dan
Posts: 1,220
Gender: Male
Location: Lafayette, LA
Age: 33
If you never do this you will always feel a tension within yourself.  Your needs are important.  Maybe in the beginning they will not know what to think and say stuff, but if you keep doing it, it will be nothing new.
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brinyskysail
Friday, August 19, 2011, 9:26pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

explorer~FM~lactose, soy, grain free
Ee Dan
Posts: 1,229
Gender: Female
Location: Bedford, PA
Age: 25
Quoted from Easy E
If you never do this you will always feel a tension within yourself.  Your needs are important.  Maybe in the beginning they will not know what to think and say stuff, but if you keep doing it, it will be nothing new.


I've come to realize that there is only 1 thing I have done in my life that I regret; I much more often regret the things I haven't done than the things I have done, no matter the outcome.  I always remind myself of that when making decisions.


There is a good in every bad  
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deblynn3
Friday, August 19, 2011, 9:41pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

GT2 Gatherer rh+;Prop-Taster
Ee Dan
Posts: 2,529
Gender: Female
Location: Arkansas
Age: 57
I spent a long weekend this spring, with friends. I took our food, plus snacks, drinks. I also premade a sweet potato shepherd's pie. enough for everyone. I got no complaints. Of Course I didn't know everyone's blood type, but my point was our food it good and really isn't weird. Next time I'm going to make cookies. Eat your heart out folks.


Swami, 100% me..
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Goldie
Friday, August 19, 2011, 10:37pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

All Gatherer -70 Scorp/Sag on BTD/GENO 17 year
Sam Dan
Posts: 5,899
Gender: Female
Location: East Coast
Ok after the visit, let us know how it went..  


Being here is invaluable, but not enough. We need ALL the Doctors. I needed them for a very small cancer spot-I could never feel!!! Please do your mammograms! Doing so saved me from cancer later on. I am grateful! Thanks for learning from my experience! I was lucky! I wish the same for YOU!
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Victoria
Saturday, August 20, 2011, 1:37am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Swami Nomad 56%
Sun Beh Nim
Moderator
Posts: 15,393
Gender: Female
Location: Oregon
If you want to be a part of their lives, they might as well have the chance to get used to you the way you are.  



Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are.
Let me not pass you by in quest
of some rare and perfect tomorrow.
~Mary Jean Irion
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Tom Martens
Saturday, August 20, 2011, 4:46am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

O Neg - ENTJ -SWAMI says GT-1 Hunter
Columnists and Bloggers
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Gender: Male
Location: Rock Island, IL
Age: 46
Thanks everyone for your thoughts.  My first mental response to a situation like this one is the knee jerk, solve the problem quick and easy and be done with it- type thing.

I guess what made me upset is that they have known me for a very long time and known that I eat a certain way.

I'll be going at this point.


Thanks again,

Tom


Be who you are.  Those who mind don't matter, those who matter won't mind.

FIfHI

M,M LeA+ LeB-

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Victoria
Saturday, August 20, 2011, 5:41am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Swami Nomad 56%
Sun Beh Nim
Moderator
Posts: 15,393
Gender: Female
Location: Oregon
Be Happy Be Happy  

        



Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are.
Let me not pass you by in quest
of some rare and perfect tomorrow.
~Mary Jean Irion
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brinyskysail
Saturday, August 20, 2011, 6:24am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

explorer~FM~lactose, soy, grain free
Ee Dan
Posts: 1,229
Gender: Female
Location: Bedford, PA
Age: 25
I love Vegan Joe's signature, and I think it fits the current situation (or any situation, really)

Quoted Text
Happiness is a personal choice.
I am the sole source of all my sadness and joy.


There is a good in every bad  
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Debra+
Saturday, August 20, 2011, 1:42pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Eat BTD...Healthy Body... Happier Soul 'Gatherer'
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 5,812
Gender: Female
Location: Kirkland Lake, Northern Ontario, Canada
Age: 57
Quoted from Tom Martens
Thanks everyone for your thoughts.  My first mental response to a situation like this one is the knee jerk, solve the problem quick and easy and be done with it- type thing.

I guess what made me upset is that they have known me for a very long time and known that I eat a certain way.

I'll be going at this point.



Thanks again,

Tom



Debra


"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung"

O+nonT

CBP (Certified BodyTalk Practitioner)
Mindscape (remote/distant healing)
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Accunect Practitioner...in training to teach Self-Care
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Goldie
Monday, August 22, 2011, 12:51pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

All Gatherer -70 Scorp/Sag on BTD/GENO 17 year
Sam Dan
Posts: 5,899
Gender: Female
Location: East Coast
and after let us know how it went????  


Being here is invaluable, but not enough. We need ALL the Doctors. I needed them for a very small cancer spot-I could never feel!!! Please do your mammograms! Doing so saved me from cancer later on. I am grateful! Thanks for learning from my experience! I was lucky! I wish the same for YOU!
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Debra+
Monday, August 22, 2011, 2:43pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Eat BTD...Healthy Body... Happier Soul 'Gatherer'
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 5,812
Gender: Female
Location: Kirkland Lake, Northern Ontario, Canada
Age: 57
Hope you had a wonderful time with your family Tom.  


Debra


"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung"

O+nonT

CBP (Certified BodyTalk Practitioner)
Mindscape (remote/distant healing)
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Accunect Practitioner...in training to teach Self-Care
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Tom Martens
Tuesday, September 6, 2011, 5:42am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

O Neg - ENTJ -SWAMI says GT-1 Hunter
Columnists and Bloggers
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Age: 46
As it turned out, my wife became ill and we had to scap the whole trip.  We didn't want to get any of the in-laws sick, especially the kids.

Oddly enough, the same in-laws came up this past weekend for the Labor Day weekend and one of their kids was running a fever.  I didn't like the idea that my daughter was going to be playing with her cousin but my wife didn't want to cause any trouble by not showing up.  My daughter has became ill just about every time these in-laws visit with a sick kid.  Sure enough, my daughter became ill and has a fever of her own now.


Be who you are.  Those who mind don't matter, those who matter won't mind.

FIfHI

M,M LeA+ LeB-

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brinyskysail
Tuesday, September 6, 2011, 7:03am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

explorer~FM~lactose, soy, grain free
Ee Dan
Posts: 1,229
Gender: Female
Location: Bedford, PA
Age: 25
Hoping she gets better soon


There is a good in every bad  
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chrissyA
Tuesday, September 6, 2011, 9:48pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

GT3 Teacher 49%, super-taster,
Autumn: Harvest, success.
Posts: 475
Gender: Female
Location: Southern Cal
Age: 51
In-laws...


SWAMI
“Let thy food be thy medicine and thy medicine be thy food.” --Hippocrates (460-377 B.C.)
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Goldie
Wednesday, October 12, 2011, 6:22am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

All Gatherer -70 Scorp/Sag on BTD/GENO 17 year
Sam Dan
Posts: 5,899
Gender: Female
Location: East Coast
The only good thing about that visit, is that, temperature in my way of seeing things often heals other stuff..


Being here is invaluable, but not enough. We need ALL the Doctors. I needed them for a very small cancer spot-I could never feel!!! Please do your mammograms! Doing so saved me from cancer later on. I am grateful! Thanks for learning from my experience! I was lucky! I wish the same for YOU!
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Sahara
Thursday, October 13, 2011, 2:32am Report to Moderator Report to Moderator
Guest User
All I can think is, why are they being so rude about your diet?  And also, not to be criticial, but why do they know about it and why weren't they willing to make a compromise?  Family.  
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yaeli
Saturday, October 15, 2011, 11:28pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

SWAMI Gatherer / Taster / ISFJ
Ee Dan
Posts: 2,547
Gender: Female
Location: Yerushalayim, Israel
Age: 66
Quoted from Tom Martens
As it turned out, my wife became ill and we had to scap the whole trip.  We didn't want to get any of the in-laws sick, especially the kids.

Oddly enough, the same in-laws came up this past weekend for the Labor Day weekend and one of their kids was running a fever.  I didn't like the idea that my daughter was going to be playing with her cousin but my wife didn't want to cause any trouble by not showing up.  My daughter has became ill just about every time these in-laws visit with a sick kid.  Sure enough, my daughter became ill and has a fever of her own now.


There is no quick solution for this one...   The issue won't go away by itself, it is worth while for all to bring it to the open...

All this is actually an invitation for you and an opportunity to relfect (further?) on including the larger family (vs. the immediate family) in your lives, letting the relationships open, letting your in-laws in and making them your own flesh and blood.




Revision History (4 edits)
yaeli  -  Sunday, October 16, 2011, 6:38am
yaeli  -  Sunday, October 16, 2011, 6:35am
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yaeli  -  Sunday, October 16, 2011, 5:52am
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Peppermint Twist
Friday, May 24, 2013, 4:00pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Gatherer; iNfj; BTD/GTD aficionado; lost 97 lbs
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 11,030
Gender: Female
Location: Florida
Age: 53
Edited to add:  the post below was typed before I read the entire thread--my bad!     See my p.s. post for updated musings, based on a reading of the entire saga versus just the original post.

I'm in the minority here:  I say that your bro-in-law sounds like a jerk and therefore don't go.

But this is a case of "those who can't, teach" (a saying which I despise, btw--the best teachers are those who CAN, have, and DO   ), since I let my sister walk all over me every summer when she and her fam are down here visiting.  She doesn't respect me at all and I don't do anything about it, to keep the peace.  I should take my own advice.  That said, with full disclosure of my hypocrisy, I say:  don't go, as bro-in-law sounds like he is hostile towards you.


"If you are on one of Dr. D's diets and it isn't joyful, you aren't doing it right." - moi

my Facebook page

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Peppermint Twist  -  Friday, May 24, 2013, 4:18pm
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Peppermint Twist
Friday, May 24, 2013, 4:16pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Gatherer; iNfj; BTD/GTD aficionado; lost 97 lbs
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 11,030
Gender: Female
Location: Florida
Age: 53
P.S.  Well, now that I read the whole thread and not just the OP, I see that you decided to go, one, and then, two, the whole trip was scrapped due to forces beyond your control.  Well, you had some great input here from everyone, both pro and con.  Every situation is different, every family is different (mine is REALLY different   ), so, just like with diet, what is best for one individual won't be best for another.  Like I said, I go through a version of this every time I'm around my sister, although as far as diet, I've got it pretty well down to a science now.  Actually, as far as everything else, I'm doing way better with it than I used to.  But STILL, it takes it outta me, every time.

As far as diet, I put nothing in my mouth that I don't want to.  If we are at a restaurant where I can eat nothing, I simply eat nothing.  I might get an iced tea w/lemon (even that is iffy at some establishments!).  If it bugs anyone or anyone has something to say about it, tough.  I am always graceful and pleasant about it and, therefore, I don't feel that anyone should have a prob with however I eat or don't eat, and if they do, it is their problem.

The only social sitches in which I still struggle are those rare times (luckily, I don’t have much of a life, so this doesn’t come up much *lol*) when someone makes something especially for ME and it is full of avoids and something I really don’t want to eat, and yet to not eat it would hurt their feelings.  IF they don’t know about my diet and/or are ignorant about certain things and really well-meaning, I will sometimes eat it.  But if they, like for example my co-workers, have known about my diet since, oh, I don’t know, 1999, and they still insist on giving me carrot cake and/or mint chip ice cream on my b-day because those do happen to be my fave cake (actually, spice cake is my fave cake, but carrot is a close second) and ice cream, then NO, sorry:  I CAN’T EAT ANY OF THAT.  “Oh, but wasn’t it considerate that they brought all your faves?”  Um, only unless you consider it considerate when a recovering alcoholic’s friends bring all her fave DRINKS to her b-day party!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Basically:  I’ve gotten a LOT more assertive, albeit in a very gentle, graceful, classy way, if I do say so myself, about eating and not eating what I want, when I want, PERIOD.  Anyone who doesn’t like it can go stuff a wheat lectin somewhere…anywhere other than in my mouth!


"If you are on one of Dr. D's diets and it isn't joyful, you aren't doing it right." - moi

my Facebook page
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Victoria
Friday, May 24, 2013, 7:37pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Swami Nomad 56%
Sun Beh Nim
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Quoted from Peppermint Twist

As far as diet, I put nothing in my mouth that I don't want to.  If we are at a restaurant where I can eat nothing, I simply eat nothing.  I might get an iced tea w/lemon (even that is iffy at some establishments!).  If it bugs anyone or anyone has something to say about it, tough.  I am always graceful and pleasant about it and, therefore, I don't feel that anyone should have a prob with however I eat or don't eat, and if they do, it is their problem.

Basically:  I’ve gotten a LOT more assertive, albeit in a very gentle, graceful, classy way, if I do say so myself, about eating and not eating what I want, when I want, PERIOD.


Yes to this!  



Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are.
Let me not pass you by in quest
of some rare and perfect tomorrow.
~Mary Jean Irion
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shoulderblade
Friday, May 24, 2013, 8:20pm Report to Moderator Report to Moderator

Rh -
Kyosha Nim
Posts: 1,092
Gender: Male
Location: Kitchener, ON.
Age: 65
Quoted from Jane
Just bring your own food and don't let it get to you.  Perhaps they are just concerned that they'll be criticized if they cook something you can't eat.  Don't let it build into something that becomes a problem.


I would agree with this. Now that you have been "confronted" you may as well play along and keep a low profile.






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