I’ve been on BTD for several years now, and I’ve long since discovered that I need to be very careful with my diet. Even small amounts of “avoids” can wreck havoc with my system, causing pain and fatigue. I couldn’t understand why some people were so hesitant to give up things like restaurant meals or bottled salad dressings. I’m doing it, so why can’t everybody else?

My kitchen was well stocked with compliant ingredients in the pantry, fridge, and freezer. On days I’m too tired to go out food shopping, I’d pull some meat and veggies out of the freezer for dinner. There was never a reason to buy less than perfectly compliant foods.

Then Hurricane Sandy hit, and we lost electricity for 9 days. My pantry was safe, but I had to throw out food from both my refrigerator and my freezer. The contents of the chest freezer in the basement melted and then re-froze, so it was another week before it thawed enough for me to clean it out. I was also hesitant at first about re-stocking the fridge and freezers, since there were power lines on my lawn and I feared we’d lose power again soon. Those power lines are STILL on my lawn, a month later, but power has been consistent so I’ve let go of that worry.

Jack’s 11th birthday arrived during that time, when power had newly been restored and the basement freezer wasn’t cleaned out yet. I’d promised him a special dinner for his birthday, separate from his postponed birthday party with friends. He wanted tacos; something we’ve stopped eating regularly since corn is an “avoid” for all 4 of us. I figured on a relatively healthy meal with organic taco shells, ground beef, smashed spiced pinto beans, guacamole, shredded lettuce, and salsa. I could easily skip the taco shells and have a compliant dinner of beef, beans, guacamole, and salsa on a bed of lettuce.

I’d made a few compromises on compliance when we were still without electricity and fuel for my car. I could only purchase what was available locally and that could be prepared without an oven. I tried to resume 100% compliance in the following weeks, but I wore myself out in the process. I found myself going to 2 or 3 stores in one day, if one store was out of an item I usually bought there. I’d run out of the house before eating lunch, then find myself skipping meals altogether. I soon realized that skipping meals was as toxic for me as eating avoids, at least when it turned into a consistent pattern.

So, I made some compromises. I bought some almonds and a kombucha with chia seeds for lunch, even though kombucha is a “black dot” for me- it’s better than skipping a meal. I couldn't find ripe avocados, and hadn't been able to purchase them 3 days before, so I purchased ready-made guacamole with vinegar in it. I bought ready-made salsa with vinegar rather than the ingredients to make my own. I then came home from food shopping ready to put together the taco dinner- I wasn't weak from skipping lunch, and food prep was easy when I had to open up two containers rather than start making a bunch of sauces.

Compromising on compliance for Jack’s birthday was the smart thing to do. I wish I’d thought to take some shortcuts a few days earlier- I might have saved myself some extra stress during an already stressful time. However, 3 weeks of carelessness is starting to catch up to me. I've been fatigued, brain-fogged, and plagued with rather severe sciatica pain, along with some low-level muscle pain all over. The fatigue, brain fog, and muscle pain have responded well to careful compliance in the past, and I suspect my diet is affecting the sciatica too. It’s time for me to resume my prior “zero tolerance” for avoids.

However, I now have a much deeper appreciation for why people choose convenience foods and feel like they “can’t” be more compliant. It’s not all a bunch of excuses! I’ll try not to be such a “compliance snob” in the future.