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Thanks for all the comments and posts on the forum re: my last blog. It’s hard for me to ask for help and to admit that I don’t have things “buttoned down”, but sometimes I need to hear my own advice from other people and get a new perspective. Thanks!
On Tuesday I saw a few bachelor apartments that were all nice, in great neighbourhoods, with good landlords. However, even though I was able to negotiate a lower rent on my favourite of the three, it just isn’t realistic financially to get my own place when I have the option of living closer to school for less money. This is a viable option, but not the best choice given the benefits below.
Yesterday, I went meet 3 girls (all have the same first name – crazy!) who are looking for a 4th to share their townhouse near school. The house and the girls were really nice, the rent is affordable, and it is 5 minutes walk from campus and the subway. Plus, they all seemed to like me and would like me to move in. How could I say no to this? Yes, I want to have my own place, but this is a much better situation in a lot of ways. I left them a message this morning to accept, I’m just waiting for them to confirm. I can’t move in there until June, so I will stay in residence in the mean time and make it work.
Needless to say, the past few days have been very stressful for me. The best cure for that (for a type O anyway) is EXERCISE! I managed to get a run in on Monday morning, but was not able to get to the gym until today. I already feel much better. I’ve been having trouble sleeping because I’m thinking so much and, like a typical type O person, I like to be active and solve problems NOW (even if it is 3am). Last night I even got a nose bleed (only the 3rd in my whole life!) and that told me that I have to do a better job of managing my stress through all the changes I’m currently experiencing.
There are other things which can help a type O person release stress. Here are the techniques outlined in LR4YT re: anger management for type O, which I think should actually be called stress management for type O:
1) Take a time-out. Take a walk, drink a glass of water, whatever you need to do. Wait for your anger to dissipate before tackling the problem.
2) Express yourself in writing. It is impossible to stay in a physical state of anger while writing.
3) Identify your anger triggers. Do they result from unrealistic expectations, childish attitudes, or mistaken ideas about the motivations of others?
4) Focus on how you feel, not how others are behaving. This will give you more power in a situation.
5) Find an activity equivalent to counting to 10.
6) Learn problem solving techniques. Anger is often the result of feeling a loss of control. Become intent on solving the problem, not on your rage.
7) Talk to someone you trust. Release stress by engaging in a supportive conversation.
The techniques I use most are #2, #5, and #7. I always feel better if I write about my problem and I often use a case writing format to figure things out – background, issue, options, pros/cons, recommendation. This is where my last blog came from – I started writing to get the thoughts out of my brain and it turned into a blog – thanks to the magic of the internet!
My equivalent to counting to 10 is alternate nostril breathing, which I every night before bed. It helps clear my mind and silence the “inner voice”. Most of the time it works great, but sometimes my mind keeps racing.
Finally, talking to people always makes me feel better and helps me sort things out. The number one person who gets called up for this is my dad, whom I’ve called multiple times per day for the past 3 days! Thankfully he is patient and makes himself available to me whenever I need him. I’ve also talked to my boyfriend (who was kind enough to look over my budget with me, make me dinner, and hug me when I cried) and my friend C, who is just great to talk to about anything.
So there you have it, one more thing settled, 5000 more to go!
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