Archives for: July 2004, 30
Well, I've turned in my resignation. I'm glad of it, but nervous, too. Monday morning I'll be going to some temp agencies near Gordon's place to let them know that I'm available. I know it is the right move for me, but it is also scary!
And I've been stressed about it since last night, and have had a headache since about 9pm last night. I even broke down and took some Tylenol a few minutes ago to try to get rid of it. If it were a dull headache or not a very bad one, I would ignore it. Unfortunately, it is a blistering one, though thankfully NOT a migraine (and I hope it doesn't turn into one).
I'm REALLY hungry tonight, too. Ate some pineapple and some salad at my break, but that was nearly 2 hours ago, and I'm hungry already, in spite of it being a LOT of pineapple and salad!
I'm sure some of this stress/headache has to do with the resignation issue, and some with my mom. I still haven't heard from her, and doubt that I will for months. It hurts to think that she might not come to our wedding, but that would be her choice. She WILL get an invitation, and I can't worry about whether or not she decides to come. She has done this to me a few times in the past - we argue, and her conflict resolution skills are so bad that she just goes away for a while, then pretends that nothing happened. Once I stopped talking to her, but every other time, she just decides that I'm such a horrible person (NOT!!) that she just doesn't want me in her life. The last time we didn't speak, it was about 9 months. After the last time, I decided that I would not stop talking with her and would try to work things out. Apparently she doesn't want to do that. I know that she is just reacting to whatever issues she has not resolved, but it still hurts, and I miss her. And I wish we could share the joy of this time of my life as I move towards my new life.
Foodwise, I've got some fabulous lamb chops that Gordon bought for me. I cooked them, and then he made a yummy wine sauce for them. I've already eaten the salad I had, but I do have lots of cherries to eat, too, which should get me through the night.
This weekend I'll be in an acting intensive weekend ALL weekend. Friday morning will be spent preparing for that, having my last session with my life coach, and then napping for a few hours. The intensive will be from 5-11 pm Friday, and then all day on Saturday and Sunday. And it will be INTENSE - it's all about breaking through the fears (or whatever) that are holding you back in your acting. Not an easy or fun weekend, but the last time I did this I had some major breakthroughs and worked through lots of stuff.