Archives for: February 2004
Friday during the day I had an acting event to go to from 10am to noon, and then was running around like crazy trying to get errands done. PO, groceries, etc. At some point during the day I called my chiropractor's office to let them know that Brad HAD called me and that we had a date set up for Saturday. The receptionist went outside to tell me that he was at the office, and that he'd apparently Googled my name and found this blog series! I started cracking up. So he'd seen my adventures and misadventures regarding Mike, and I just thought it was hysterical. And I wondered if he would tell me that he'd seen it or not! I decided to wait and see if he mentioned it.
Got home around 3 pm, and did a few things around the apartment, and left a message for Anne to see if she wanted to watch "Joan of Arcadia" with me, and to call me before the show started to wake me up. Then I got in bed for what I thought would be a couple hours worth of sleep - Anne called me at 9:45, we'd missed the show because she fell asleep after work and had just woken up. Oops. So I got up and watched a little TV and was asleep again within an hour or so. Woke up at 4am on Saturday, and couldn't get back to sleep. And was starving at 5am.
So at 5am I got up, started a load of laundry, did the dishes, did an hour of Pilates, a little bit of yoga, showered, dressed, and headed to Starbucks to meet Brad for coffee. We had a terrific conversation, talked about food, life, yoga, back problems, and all kinds of things, and spent about three hours together. And he DID 'fess up to having seen the blog, and I 'fessed up that the receptionist had told me that he'd seen it. All told, pretty funny! And I won't be complaining about Brad or Mike here!
Back to the date. I had a really nice time! The conversation with Brad just flowed, and I really enjoyed spending time with him, and he was very complimentary - even told me I could cook for him anytime after I described one dish I'd just made! We're supposed to go hiking together next weekend.
After coffee, I headed to a vocal class - I've always strained to be heard and have been known to lose my voice occasionally, and as an actor that is just not good. So I wanted to find out what the problem was, and see how to fix it. I never expected to solve the problem in a three hour class, but he diagnosed the problem within seconds of me opening my mouth, and taught us all a few simple techniques to use to find our true voices. WOW! My voice doesn't SOUND different to the average person, but it sure FEELS different to me! I went to a concert last night and screamed louder and longer than anyone, and didn't strain a bit. Very cool. So I'm practicing all the time so it becomes the natural way for me to speak.
Headed home completely jazzed after the class, and headed home to meet up with Mike and his friend Carrie (a former colleague of his from DC). When I got home I found out that Carrie was meeting us at the venue, so Mike and I grabbed a quick dinner and talked about a few issues that had come up over the last few days. We have resolved them for now, but he's on notice to behave! We drove over to the venue and met Carrie. She'd just flown in from Thailand (vacation), Mike had been up very late the night before, and I'd woken up at 4am, so none of us were terribly awake, but we thoroughly enjoyed Taj Mahal and the opening act (Shamiqua?) - great blues and lots of fun, fun music.
After the concert we were taking Carrie back to her friend's house and stopped for a bite to eat - they ONLY had sandwiches and junk food, so I did the best I could and ordered a turkey sandwich on rye, figuring that even if there's wheat in the rye it was better than any of the other options. We ate quickly 'cuz we had to sit outside in the cold, and then dropped Carrie off and headed home. So I got to bed about 2am, and then tossed and turned until 9am, when I gave up on sleep and decided to get started on my Sunday. I'd hoped to sleep late this morning so as to be better off tonight for work, but it just didn't happen, because I had to meet up with a friend of mine from when I lived in San Antonio six years ago. I hadn't seen Rachel since she got married four years ago, and she now has a three year old. So we met up for lunch today at Jerry's Famous Deli. She looks fantastic, and her daughter and I hit it off pretty quickly. Cute little girl, with the LONGEST eyelashes I've ever seen. I had a great time watching her and seeing Rachel's transformation from single woman to wife and mom. I was laughing at her being such a mom - it was great! So we had a fun lunch, and then they had to head back home, and I came home to try to nap before my singing workshop this afternoon, but I couldn't sleep (again!), so I got online, and I have to head out in a few minutes.
Won't get to watch the Oscars since I'll be in my workshop, but I'm taping them and will go over to Mike's to join him and Carrie for the end of the show. I plan to stay just a little while, though, because I have GOT to get some sleep before I go to work tonight! Even a couple hours will help at this point, especially considering that I have an acting event tomorrow at noon, and then another one at 7pm, so I really need to get sleep whenever I can the next few days. I need to grab some food before I go to my workshop - I'm still having blood sugar issues. Aargh.
Well, I didn't make it to the gym after all. I slept from 11am until 9:30 pm, and had trouble getting out of bed even then. Turned on the TV to watch the rest of "The Apprentice" and the "ER". Got up during the commercial break between shows, and got ready for work during "ER". Ate some leftover egg scramble from this morning, prepared a nice salad for lunch tonight, and headed to Starbucks since I was ready to go by 11:10 and didn't have to be at work until midnight. I hung out at SBUX for about 30 minutes listening to three men discussing some pseudo-philosophical/pseudo-political stuff and sat there laughing at the utter lack of common sense they exhibited in their discussion. It reminded me of when I was in college and we would sit around having this type of discussion, all based on what we'd read, and thinking that what we were discussing was the most important issue in the world, and that we were the only ones who could solve it, even though we didn't have an original thought in our heads. Overhearing their conversation brought back some great memories of those days and thoughts of friends I had back then. I'll get to see one of my best friends from high school and college later this year, and I am SO looking forward to seeing her. She would also have been amused by this conversation tonight.
I headed into work, still early, and sat in the parking lot practicing my singing. I'm starting a singing workshop this weekend that will culminate in a performance in April, so I have to practice as much as I can. If I'm in the car these days, I'm singing my heart out!
Tomorrow will be a busy day, and I probably won't get to sleep much during the day - I've got an orientation for an acting network from 10-noon, have to run to the PO, and have other assorted errands to do before the weekend, which will also be very busy. And I still want to get to the gym! I'm going to try to sleep no more than 3 hours during the day tomorrow so I can sleep tomorrow night - I have a very full day on Saturday and have to be functional all day.
I'm having an eczema breakout on my scalp from something I've eaten. It could be from the cookies yesterday, but it seems 'different' from my usual wheat reaction, so I'm going to be eliminating stuff from my diet to see if I can clear my system out. And no more wheat, definitely!
I knew I'd get some babysitting jobs to help me make ends meet! I will be sitting for this family next Wednesday and the following Wednesday. That will be grocery money and will help me pay off one little debt that I want to get rid of ASAP!
So I babysat for an 18 month old little boy - he is a gorgeous child, blond hair, brown eyes, and when he flashes that smile of his, it melts my heart! Unfortunately, yesterday he was not smiling much! He was so tired, and had a bit of a runny nose, and I couldn't get him to go down for a nap, couldn't get him to eat, and no activity was acceptable for passing the time. And it didn't help that I'd had only 2 hours of sleep and that his mother and I both hoped he'd take a LONG nap so that I could nap, too. In my frustration, fatigue, and partly because of the lack of decent food in the house, I ate two chocolate chip cookies, and only afterwards thought about them being wheat and about me not wanting to eat wheat again until my birthday. Oops. Didn't even make it a day! But I went to the grocery store and bought good stuff, and I'll make sure to take food with me next week so that I have better options and WON'T succumb to the cookies!
After the grocery store, I headed home, threw all the food into the fridge, got into bed (it was 5pm), and slept until 11:10 pm. My alarm went off at 10pm. It was pouring outside, and was great weather for sleeping, which I could have easily done until morning. Instead, I dragged myself out of bed, put on some warm clothes, and came into the office. I'm hoping it will still be raining in the morning so that I can easily sleep tomorrow.
I didn't eat much at all today - had a banana, some soy milk, 2 choc chip cookies, and some wheat-free toast with almond butter on it. And all that was before I slept tonight. Had a few bites of chicken pesto sausage tonight, but that's it so far. Just not very hungry! I do have a smoothie here, though, and I'm trying to drink that down - it's got pineapple juice, a banana, and a ton of supplements in it.
Tomorrow once I wake up I want to go work out at the gym - I haven't been there in days and days. Sleep is a higher priority! But it's time to try to get some consistency back into my workout plan.
I am still bloated from the wheat, but not as badly as I was yesterday. My new goal is to go 60 days without touching wheat. I can do this! That will bring me close to my birthday, so I will have a planned avoid and eat birthday cake for my birthday.
Didn't get much sleep yesterday. I had to deal with a touchy situation at work, and wanted to talk with Mike about it, and then he wanted to talk to me about something that happened during his trip. It was difficult for him to talk about it, and it was our first 'serious' conversation. I think he was nervous about what my reaction would be to having this conversation - he couldn't look at me most of the time he was telling me about it, and I know he's embarrassed about what happened. There are some things that need to be done to resolve the issue, and that will take place over the next couple of months. Ultimately it will not be a major event in his life, but it feels like a big deal to him now. I'm a bit more removed, so my perspective is that it isn't as big of a deal as he's making it now. I won't share what he's going through here since it's MY life that I'm willing to put on stage, not his.
I will, though, share what happened to me at work. My colleague, who I've known barely a month, told me that he likes me. Sent me a couple of emails telling me that I have marvelous eyes, beautiful smile, whatever. Now, I don't want to make waves with management, and I NEED this job, so I've pretty much ignored it until yesterday. He sent me an email telling me that he's got feelings for me. I've done nothing to encourage ANYONE around here that way - I've got my hands full with Mike and now Brad (the guy from the chiro's office!), and it wouldn't be professional, either. This man is married, too, and I would certainly never encourage something there. I've been professional, friendly, and have largely kept to myself (easy to do when you're tethered to a phone all night). So I got this email, and responded with the following:
"You crazy man! That's very sweet that you have a crush on me, but just remember that I am only a woman - AND your colleague! And aren't you married?" and followed up by telling him that I think it is inappropriate for him to have feelings for me, that he is my colleague, is married, and should be giving compliments to his wife, not to me. I also told him that he barely knows me, and has feelings for this illusion of what he thinks I am like, not the reality of the person that I am. I wanted to be honest and also be blunt that nothing will EVER happen (even if he were single I'm SOOOOO not attracted to him!). He got the point, and I hope that is the end of it. But by the time I got home this morning I was emotionally exhausted. This was unexpected and completely caught me by surprise. So when I got home I wanted to see a friendly face whose attentions I DO welcome, so I called Mike and told him I needed a hug. If my colleague doesn't get the message, I will discuss it with management. I don't need this kind of crap at work. I want to do my job, and land acting jobs so I can quit and get out of here!
Otherwise, things are fine - back on track with my food, and desperately need to get to the grocery store. I ate shrimp and black-eyed peas for lunch yesterday because it was about all I had in the apartment. Tonight's lunch is a smoothie and wheat-free toast and almond butter. I'll get to the store today and prepare something decent for lunch tomorrow.
Brad called me tonight and asked me out for coffee for Saturday morning, so we're meeting up at a Starbucks between us. I won't have a lot of time Saturday - vocal class starts at 2pm, and a concert that night with Mike and a friend of his from out of town, but it will be good to spend a little time with Brad and see if he is someone (else!) I'd like to spend time with.
... does not make for a happy O! I left work this morning and headed to my audition. Only had a couple of lines to learn, so they took me early and I was in and out of there by 10 am. I really liked them, and they seemed to really like me, so we'll see how it goes! I had lots of time to kill before picking Mike up at the airport, but not enough time to head home and nap a little while and head back over the hill to LAX. So I stayed in Beverly Hills, and decided to go for tea at the Regent Beverly Wilshire. Beautiful location, lovely restaurant, and I spent two hours sitting there sipping tea and ice water, watching people, reading the paper, and enjoying the environment. The waiters were very attentive, and yet unobtrusive. It was a great way to spend a couple hours without spending a lot of money.
Then I headed to the airport to pick Mike up. His flight was on time, and we headed home without a hitch. It was good to see him! I was getting pretty hungry by this time, and was ready to eat my steering wheel and he suggested Quizno's. I wasn't going to argue, because I knew I needed food ASAP. Big mistake. I had a delicious Tuscan Chicken Sandwich, and then we headed home and I went to bed to catch some ZZZZs before coming into work. I tossed and turned with bloating and gas and just an uncomfortable feeling. Never did sleep well, and woke up at 10 feeling completely dragged out. It had been a while since I'd had any wheat, let alone any avoids, and I thought I could get away with it. Nope! So tonight I am wiped out, bloated, and have heartburn. Had a smoothie meal before coming to work and put pineapple juice in it. Brought cherry juice and Gerolsteiner (sparkling mineral water) to work tonight and will be drinking PLENTY of water to flush this crud out of my system. I was a full TWO pounds heavier tonight than I was this morning. TWO pounds! Assuming that is all the bloating that I feel, two pounds of water is 32 ounces! A whole QUART of water. That's a lot of water!
Anyway, the pain of the indulgence just isn't worth it, and I'm going to do my best not to give in to the siren call again anytime soon! Blah!
The last time I had wheat was when Mike ordered a pizza for the Golden Globes. That was 30 days ago. THIRTY DAYS! If I did that once, I can do that again, and then some. I think I'll see if I can make it to my birthday without any wheat whatsoever. That is a little over two months from now. I can do this!
Did make myself do a 20 minute Pilates video tonight before work, so at least I did SOMETHING today, exercise-wise. Tomorrow I should be able to get to the gym and do a 'full' workout.
Yesterday ended up being a very lazy day, and today looks to be similar. I got lots done yesterday morning, and then crashed around noon for a couple of hours. The phone rang around 2pm, and it was the guy from the chiropractor's office! We chatted for nearly an hour, and finally he asked me out for sometime this week. He seems to be a VERY nice man. He's a chef, and since he'll be working in my chiropractor's office, it was easy to ask him what his blood type is - he's a B+! Just like Mike! Aack! Too funny.
After we got off the phone, I tried to sleep some more - it rained most of the day, and was a great day for napping. But I couldn't really sleep anymore, so I got up, dressed, and headed for Starbucks and the bookstore. Got myself a steamed soymilk and went to browse the books. Spent about 3 hours reading and looking at some wonderful books, and enjoying my drink.
I did do a manicure and pedicure yesterday, so I did pamper my hands and feet - didn't watch a single movie or anything, though. The bookstore was a better option for me last night anyway. I needed to get out of the apartment and do something.
Never did work out yesterday, even though I got a few errands done. I got home shortly after 8, and watched 'Trading Spaces' and 'Clean Sweep' on TV, and made myself stay up until nearly midnight so that I wouldn't wake up too early this morning. About 11 pm I was hungry, so had some oatmeal with a dash of vanilla and some cinnamon and honey. I don't often eat oatmeal, but it was perfect for the weather and my mood last night. Finally went to bed, and slept solidly until 6:30 this morning. Woke up roasting, so took a blanket off the bed and went back to sleep until 10:30. It poured outside until about 11, and was great sleeping weather. It's starting to break up out there now, and I can even see a patch of blue sky.
I've been fighting the tiniest bit of a sore throat for the last couple of days, so I am avoiding doing much that doesn't have to be done. I basically feel fine, just a little sore throat and I'm almost always tired. I'm sure that some of this is due to working nights.
In terms of my diet, I've been doing really well. I'm eating no avoids, and have found it easy to turn down tempting foods lately. I even made it through PMS without eating any wheat, and that is always THE most difficult time for me to avoid wheat and other avoids. I'm still about 9 pounds above my pre-broken leg weight, but I'll get there. I'm working on cutting out all sugars now, so we'll see what effect that has on my weight.
Had scrambled eggs and wheat-free cinnamon raisin toast for breakfast this morning - yum! For dinner I've got shrimp fried rice that I made the other night, and I've got some salmon in the freezer. Have to get to the grocery store in the next couple of days.
Mike comes home tomorrow, and I'll be glad to see him. Anne asked me the other day if I miss him, and I had to admit that yeah, I do miss him! I also told her I was trying NOT to miss him. She said he was probably trying not to miss me, too. Tomorrow will be busy - I'll get off work at 8:30 am, head to an audition location by 9:30, learn my lines and audition at 10:50, then head to the airport to pick Mike up at 1:30 pm. There isn't time to run home and nap between any of this, so I'll have to go to sleep once I get home, probably around 3pm or later.
I don't think I'll work out today, either - my energy level isn't very high, and a nap is in order for this evening. I do have to vacuum and clean the bathroom, but that won't take long. Then it's naptime!
... is way too early to be up by my standards. The only problem, really, is that I can't sleep anymore. I slept six hours yesterday in the afternoon - longer than I wanted to sleep to switch back to sleeping at night for the weekend, but not as long as my body would have liked to have slept. Then I spent last night cleaning my apartment a little bit and watching TV with Anne and then by myself. I did an hour of Pilates, too, and I can already tell that my abs are stronger from doing it. Movements that would have been painful a month ago and would have hurt my back are easier or effortless now. This working out thing is powerful stuff!
The last time I looked at the clock was at 3:16 this morning, and was awake again just after six. It was clear that I wouldn't be able to sleep any more, either, so I got up and got dressed. As soon as it is late enough, I'll head to the Post Office and run a couple other errands. Then I've GOT to get back here and finish cleaning my apartment. Mike will be back on Monday, and this place is still a disaster! I've also got to make some phone calls today and take care of a few administrative details that I need to wrap up.
Anne is working all day today - has a shift at both of her jobs, so I won't get to see her at all. And my other plans for today fell through because my friend's aunt came to town suddenly, and Mike is out of town, so I am going to have a little 'retreat' day once I'm done with my to-do list. I'll go workout, then come home and do some spa treatments. Seems like a good day to relax and pamper myself a little! I've also got several movies I want to watch, VCR tapes to catch up on, and I'd love to clean OFF my entire desk. So spa stuff and puttering sound like a great plan.
I may also have coffee (chai tea for me!) with a friend of mine. We'll see if that happens or not - he had a cold the other day and may not be up for it.
Slept 8 hours today, which was great. I'm glad I seem to be adjusting to the night shift. Got up around 6:30, and Anne called me a few minutes after I woke up asking me if I had anything sweet in the apartment. A couple of weeks ago I bought some Soy Delicious Chocolate Obsession ice cream, which has sat untouched in the freezer. I told her that I had it, and she said, "I'll be right up." So we had a little ice cream (I had a very little bit of it) and talked about our days. She didn't stay long, and I got changed to go to the gym and work out. Watched a little TV, did a few things on my home computer, ate a buffalo burger and some boiled sweet potato, gathered all the clothes, makeup, shower stuff, etc. that I would need, and headed out. Haven't been there in about 10 days, so I felt a bit out of sync.
Got to the gym about 10pm, and spent over 40 minutes on the elliptical machine at a fairly easy pace. I just wasn't up for a really hard workout, but I still felt pretty wiped out by the time I was done. I knew I didn't have time to do a full weight routine, too, so I got on the rowing machine for about 6 minutes and rowed like crazy to work my arms and abs some. My arms were pleasantly sore afterwards. Then I did a few minutes of yoga poses, tried to do the splits (getting closer!), and spent a few minutes in downward facing dog and cobra pose. Felt really good when I was done. Took a quick shower, dressed, did my makeup, and headed in to work.
I've got an audition to prepare for over the next couple of days, so I have my work cut out for me over the weekend. It will be busy! I've got plans with various friends, I need to vacuum and otherwise clean my apartment, and need a few hours throughout the weekend to feel completely prepared for my audition. I think it will go well.
I left work at 7am yesterday, and took Mike to the airport. Hour down to LAX, and an hour back. Blah. And it started raining about 20 minutes after I dropped him off, which made traffic especially nasty since Southern California drivers seem to like to drive just as fast when there is rain and no visibility as when it is 70 and sunny. Aarrgh.
Had about 30 minutes at home before I had to dash out the door again for my first chiropractic visit in three months. Had a couple kinks that yoga just wasn't getting rid of. So headed over to the chiropractor's office (30 miles away, and in the rain) and then waited about 45 minutes while they tended to a guy whose back was spasming. He and I were in the waiting room and chatted for about 15 minutes before they were ready for him - we had a lot to talk about - yoga, meditation, skiing, cooking, etc. He's a chef! And he's going to be working in the chiropractor's new offices once they move next month! And she's a BTD practitioner! This is way cool news! They adjusted him, and then he couldn't get out the door without spasming again, so he was still there when I left. I've been there, and don't want to go back! And when the massage therapist came in to me, she told me that he was asking questions about me and seemed very interested! He seems cute, intelligent, and nice enough, so we'll see. I don't want to discount the budding relationship I have with Mike, but I also don't want to put all my eggs in one basket, either! So I'll probably meet him for coffee some morning and we'll see how things go. He was complaining about not being able to go skiing this weekend because of his back, and said he'd be doing a lot of meditation to get past the suffering of not being able to go. I told him that suffering is optional, and that apparently a quiet weekend relaxing at home and taking care of his back was exactly what he needed, even if it wasn't what he *wanted*. He grumbled in agreement, and we both laughed.
When Dr. D came to SoCal last April or so during his "Eat RIght 4 Your Baby" book promotion tour, I told my chiropractor about his visit, and she showed up, along with her mother (also a chiropractor) and several other patients of hers. So she and Dr. D got to meet, which was very cool for me!
Anyway, she and the massage therapist were both very impressed with the results I've had from working out so much and eating this way, and could not believe that I hadn't even been in the office for three months, which is a record for me! I've been going to chiropractors regularly (and I mean a couple times a month to a couple times a week!) for years now. So for me to come in and not be in major pain after three months is incredible. YOGA, YOGA, YOGA!
I got home from the chiropractor's in the pouring rain, and it was great weather for sleeping. I was in bed by 1pm, and slept until 9:30, the 5pm knock on the door from Anne notwithstanding. She only stayed a couple minutes because I was largely incoherent, and she felt bad that she'd awakened me. I was asleep again within seconds, so it wasn't a big deal.
When I woke up, I had to cook dinner, shower, and get ready to go to work. I spent nearly two hours in the kitchen preparing buffalo burgers, boiling a sweet potato, sautéeing an onion, and making my fruit, nut, yogurt mixture as well as a smoothie for breakfast, whenever that might be. I ate some sweet potato, onion, and a buffalo burger, and a couple of bites of fruit for dinner. Put most of it in a bag and schlepped it all to work for lunch and snacks.
I have very little money the next couple of weeks - I've only had one paycheck so far, and the expenses for the next few weeks are fairly fixed. And considering that I took a nearly 50% pay cut from my last job, I will have to be very careful about how I eat and what I eat so that I can make sure I stay fairly nutritionally balanced for the next few weeks until my budget gets more routine. I know I'll be fine - babysitting jobs are sure to come up, and I can probably postpone one expense until mid-March if I have to, but I'd rather not unless absolutely necessary. So no Starbucks iced venti soy chai tea lattes for a while, and nothing but the essentials in general. I may be making lots of soups!
I slept for 9 and a half hours yesterday, from 10 am until the phone rang at 7:30 pm. Very nice. I'm definitely feeling the effects of my cycle, though, as I'm still really tired. Mike called to let me know what the plan was for me to take him to the airport in the morning and to nail down some other details regarding his trip. Then Anne called, upset about her mother. Mom's been really depressed lately and is making comments about possibly not being around when Anne has children, etc. This IS her fourth bout with cancer, and she's extremely tired from the radiation treatments, but that kind of thinking will not help her deal with the cancer. Anne is frazzled, doesn't have the time or energy to help her mom out much, and is struggling just to deal with this herself. And it doesn't help that their relationship is codependent enough that Anne's mom expects Anne to do way too much under the guise of "You would if you loved me", which then makes Anne feel guilty and give in, even if she sacrifices her own needs to do so. Anne's mom doesn't have a very good sense of self-esteem (it's lower than the carpet pad), so she feels the need to be validated by everyone in her life on a nearly constant basis.
So I told Anne that her mom's self-esteem is not her responsibility, and she doesn't HAVE to do anything for her mother, that she needs to take care of herself first, and THEN, if and only if she has the time, energy, and inclination, should she even consider helping her mom do anything. Anne has sacrificed her own health in the past to do stuff for her mom, and she's stretched thin enough right now as it is. She's working two jobs AND doing extra house and pet-sitting and the occasional babysitting job to make ends meet, and she's been getting sick quite a bit lately herself. She doesn't need to risk getting herself sick, nor does she need to spend time with her mom if she is ill and risk getting mom sick while her immune system is down.
I know Anne will do what she feels is right throughout this, and I'll be there to support her AND her mom throughout this as best I can.
I made some eggs and toast for breakfast (at 9pm) and dressed for work. Ran a quick errand at the drugstore - finally got some earplugs, and headed in to the office early so I can leave early to take Mike to the airport.
After ten hours of sleep on Sunday and working all night, I slept 9 blissful hours during the day yesterday. Woke up feeling almost normal! Made dinner, which consisted of an egg scrambled with a little bit of sausage and spinach, and a small serving of blueberries, banana, pecans, and soy yogurt. Then I went downstairs to Anne's to watch TV with her until I needed to get ready for work. While I was at her place I got hungry, and she made me some spelt toast with soy cream cheese on it. I also ate some honey barbecue potato chips. I was craving carbs, more specifically WHEAT, which only happens right before my period. Thus far I have avoided the temptation, but only because I ate the spelt bread and had toasted Ezekial bread when I took a break a little while ago.
This job is interesting - it is the most boring position I've ever had, and I have to wonder how typical it is of call centers in general. I might have 20 calls a night, and they might last up to 5 minutes, so I only work a little over an hour and a half, if that. Last night I think I had 10 calls. When we're not on a call we are allowed to surf the web, read, play games, chat with our colleagues, etc., as long as we are not disruptively loud and are available to take calls. I'm catching up on my reading, and I am enjoying how little I have to actually 'work', but I also want to get out of this position as quickly as possible and get cracking on acting jobs! I've gotten three auditions lined up so far, and I've got to keep looking for more. I *will* land something sometime that will pay enough to spring me from this job, so I just have to keep plugging away. In the meantime, it isn't intolerable. But the hours and the lack of things to do are not easy to deal with. I'd much rather be acting.
Speaking of auditions, I auditioned for a breast cancer self-exam video for the Susan G. Komen Foundation that will be given to doctors to educate their patients. It's about the only acting job for which I would consider taking my top off, which I did have to do for the audition since they have to make sure that the breasts in a breast cancer screening video are a certain size and shape, etc. The situation was very professional, and I really hope I get the role since Anne's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer about 2 months ago. At least if I got the role I would feel like I am able to give something back, and it sure beats feeling like I can't do anything to help Anne's mom. Cross your fingers for me that I get it.
I have another audition for a reality show next week. We'll see how that goes!
I never made it to yoga yesterday - I fell asleep on my couch at 1:30, and woke up at 6:30 pm and wanted to sleep even more, but Anne was coming over to watch last Thursday's "Friends" and "ER" and I needed to do some grocery shopping, do some laundry, and get ready for work. I threw my laundry in the wash about 7:30 and headed out to Trader Joe's for food. I had nothing in the house to make for lunch, so I HAD to go before they closed at 9pm.
I got a bunch of great, healthy stuff: buffalo, salmon, swordfish, shrimp, chicken pesto sausage, eggs, blueberries, bananas, mangos, onions, pineapple juice, mango nectar, cherry juice, wheat-free bread, apples, spinach, soy yogurt, etc.
Lunch was about 12:30, so by the time I got home around 8:30 I really needed to eat again. Cut up a sausage over some spinach with some tomato, celery, and snow peas that Anne brought me, and tossed it with some dressing. Yummy. Also ate a few bites of lemon soy yogurt with bluberries, banana, and pecans mixed in. Ate more of my yogurt/fruit concoction around 10:30 pm, and dressed to head in to work
I hope everyone had a lovely Valentine’s Day! Last weekend Mike asked me if I would be his Valentine, which was very sweet. So we went out last night and had dinner at a Greek restaurant nearby. I got a lamb platter, he got a vegetarian platter, and we shared as we were entertained by the Greek music and dancing. Good fun!
Then we went to a local 99-seat theater and saw a witty and charming musical called “Don’t Hug Me”. It is about a bar in Minnesota, and the havoc that ensues when one of the bar owners buys a karaoke machine. With songs like “I’m a Walleye Woman in a Crappie World”, it doesn’t take itself too seriously. There were some great moments in it, and we both enjoyed it quite a bit.
After the show, we went to Hollywood and attempted to go do something touristy like go to Mann’s Chinese Theater and see the hand and foot prints in the cement out front. We never even got out of the car. Between the traffic (horrendous), the police (everywhere), the parking (non-existent), and the hour (after midnight), we spent 2 hours driving around and talking, and never did stop anywhere. So we came back to the apartment building and bid each other goodnight.
I was really glad that we ended up at a Greek place for dinner – Mike knows about my food allergies and roughly remembers what I can and can’t eat, but the original place we would have gone to was Italian, and even if they have something other than pasta, my options are severely limited. The Greek place was excellent, and I didn’t have to worry about being able to find something to eat.
This past week has been quite good in terms of diet AND exercise in spite of the lack of sleep. I did yoga or Pilates most every day, got on the treadmill in my building three times, and walked about 2 miles on Friday before I babysat. I didn’t have time to work out yesterday, but I am going to yoga today. And whether it is because of the diet and exercise or the change to the night shift or both, I’ve lost about three pounds in the last week or two. And THAT means that I only have 8 pounds to go to get back to where I was before I broke my leg, and only 13-15 pounds to go to get to what I consider my ideal weight. Yay!
Naptime - I have to work at midnight tonight.
I barely slept yesterday - there was construction going on outside, and my cats were tearing around, and the phone kept ringing, and I tossed and turned all day, even though I spent 5 hours in bed during the day and l went back to bed about 9:30 tonight for about 2 1/2 hours. I'm struggling tonight, and do not wish to resort to the caffeine tempting me from the vending machines.
I was very productive during work last night, and I'm fighting to be productive tonight. Last night I submitted for a ton of auditions, and I already have a couple of them lined up over the next several days. Yay! I also replied to tons of emails that had been languishing in my inbox for too long.
I also had an appointment yesterday evening regarding an acting organization - terrific resource for networking as well as LOTS of industry information. I signed up for training later this month. Very impressive place.
Diet and exercise are both still very much on track. In spite of my lack of sleep, I did a few minutes of Pilates tonight, but had to stop because Mike came over for a little while, and then I had to get to work.
Until the phone rang and woke me up, I got another five hours of sleep yesterday after work. Was wide awake, so got up and worked out a while. Did a mile on the treadmill and then did about 30 minutes of power yoga. Took a two hour nap in the evening, too, but tossed and turned for a while.
Got up again at 10 pm, dressed, and went to SBUX for a soy chai tea latte – there’s one that closes at midnight down the street from me, which will come in handy when I have to be at work at midnight. I don’t want to get in the habit of going there before work, but it’s nice to know it is available if I feel like I need an extra boost to get through the day.
Food-wise, other than tonight’s chai, I’ve been doing REALLY well. Lamb, salads, sausages, asparagus, and basically no sugar for days. I’m really pushing the protein and veggies and fruit because I think I need the extra nutritional support since I’m working nights. Been taking lots of B vitamins, too.
Went for a 5-7 minute walk around the parking lot at lunch (at 5am) and it helped me stay more alert this morning. I've been kind of hungry all night, too, in spite of having eaten something every two hours and drinking tons of water. I'll make some eggs when I get home.
When I got home yesterday, I took a bath and climbed in bed within 40 minutes of arriving home. Slept really well for five hours, and woke up because of the noise of the construction taking place on my street. I think I'll buy some earplugs so that doesn't happen on a regular basis.
Once I woke up I was wide awake. Watched a little TV, put on my workout clothes, and worked out really hard. Did 2 miles on the treadmill, and jogged about a mile of that, which felt great! Then I did weights, and was still wired. So then I did an hour of Pilates. Then I showered and climbed back in bed. Didn't sleep well, but I did get a couple more hours in, and I have felt much more normal tonight/this morning than I did last night! Just about 2 more hours to go now, and then I head home for sleep. I'm still not very hungry, so I'm eating when I get hungry and not eating when I don't, except to make sure that I am eating SOMETHING, even if it something small and protein packed to keep my blood sugar steady. Right before I went to sleep yesterday I was suddenly ravenous, so I ate a chicken/turkey pesto sausage link and went to bed.
I did about 20 minutes of yoga when I got up at midnight to get ready for work, and I am feeling pleasantly sore from yesterday's workout. I'll be working out again later today, though probably not with the intensity of yesterday - perhaps just a yoga DVD. It will all depend on how well I sleep and how I feel when I get up.
I had a nice nap yesterday afternoon - about two and a half hours, but I didn't sleep straight through. I've been at work since 1:30 this morning, and it's now 6:30. So far so good. I'm being as careful as I can be about my diet and exercising: lamb, spinach, and rice for dinner last night, and healthy snacks and food here at work (trail mix and blueberries). I'm drinking tea, so no cokes or anything else from the vending machines.
I can tell that I'm tired, though. I've been a little cold for the last couple hours, I'm not hungry at all, but if I were to eat anything my choice would be sugar, and my vocabulary has decreased in English and especially in French. The one call I took in French I barely understood much of what he said - he spoke in such technical terms that I wouldn't have understood it in English, let alone in French. I'm still sitting with someone else until I get my logons, so I'm learning quickly how to say things, how to ask things, and I'm learning and remembering lots of vocabulary.
We'll see how this night shift goes and how quickly I can get up to speed with the French technical terms.
Mike and I walked to the grocery store yesterday and he said that he'd buy a boneless leg of lamb if I would cook it. I don't turn down lamb, especially the good quality cuts! When we got back to the apartment building, I marinated it in black cherry juice, fresh garlic, and herbes de provence for about three hours. Popped it in the oven for about an hour, made some rice and spinach, and we had a wonderful meal. This is the second meal I've made for Mike, and he has raved both times. I hadn't ever tried to marinate lamb with this combination, so I wasn't sure how it would turn out, but I even impressed myself. There are leftovers, too, which I'm very much looking forward to eating tonight!
Mike asked me if I would be his Valentine! We're definitely not 'just friends' or 'just neighbors'!
Three more hours until I can go home and go to sleep.
I start the night shift tonight, and I went to bed at 5:15 this morning. I'd hoped to stay awake until dawn, but didn't quite make it. I plan to take a nap this evening, say around 9pm, and then get up at midnight and get ready for work.
Stayed up last night by watching a DVD ("Marvin's Room - wonderful!) with Mike. Kicked him out, cleaned the kitchen, watched TV, and then did Pilates for an hour. Finally gave up when I was falling asleep in my La-Z Boy.
I woke up starving today! Made some scrambled eggs with salmon, and I'm heading to the grocery store shortly to get some ground lamb, spinach, and maybe some feta cheese to throw into eggs on the weekends. I made some quinoa and rice (a Seeds of Change package - yummy stuff!) the other night, and I've got a salad and also a shrimp and asparagus dish. That ought to hold me tonight during work. I need to take some kind of snacky stuff like dried fruit or blueberries. When I get tired I want sugar, so to avoid the vending machines I'll need something better.
I had another close call yesterday, and I think it was related to blood sugar levels. I don't get paid until next Friday, so I don't have a lot of money right now, and have been holding off on going to the grocery store. I had rice cereal and soy milk for breakfast, and then went to an appointment. Five hours later, I headed home, and ran a red light at a busy intersection nearly hitting two cars. I thank God that we didn't collide! As I was driving home and feeling VERY lucky, I realized that I had not even SEEN the light, and that I'd been hungry for a couple hours during my appointment. Normally when I get hungry I don't have serious blood sugar issues, but since I'd had very little protein in my breakfast, I think my blood sugar peaked and crashed instead of being its usual steady level. I'm buying some chicken sausage today so that I will have some easy protein at the ready at all times.
Heading off to the store now, and trying to stay safe!
Fridays have a whole new meaning now that I'm working again. Two days of play time! I have to gear up for working nights, now, too! I'm planning on playing quite a bit this weekend so that I'm good and tired come Sunday afternoon and can nap for a while.
Tonight Anne and I are going to run the errands we never ran on Tuesday, and tomorrow will be a day filled with more errands and a birthday party tomorrow evening.
Got an email from Mike thanking me for spoiling him for his birthday - good. We all deserve to be spoiled on our birthdays. I'm also glad that he appreciated my efforts! Hope to see him this weekend, too.
I am sore from my workout last night - but a good sore. I am continuing to push my physical limits, and wonder just how fit I can get. I still want to decrease my body fat percentage and up my lean body mass, and I think I can make great strides on that in just a couple of months. (Sounds so much better to say that I want to 'decrease my body fat percentage' than it does to say 'I want to lose 15 pounds', doesn't it?!?
I've been doing GREAT in terms of food now that I'm getting used to working again. Haven't had any avoids in days except for a couple bites of birthday cake and cheesecake the other night. I'm going to try to get in another workout tonight if I wrap up errands with Anne before the gym closes. Will work out over the weekend once or twice, too.
I never did get to work out last night - Mike called me about 8 pm and we were finalizing plans for this evening (today is his birthday) and talking about our respective days. An hour later, I still hadn't eaten dinner or worked out. I tossed my dinner in the microwave, and finally sat down to eat about 9 pm.
Then my best friend, Anne, called me and I could tell she was upset. She asked if she could come upstairs to visit. Of course! She arrived, and started venting about her life and how she doesn't know what she wants to do, let alone how to go about getting it. I understand where she's coming from since I was in the same position a few years ago. I listened while she talked and cried, and I tried to offer as little advice as possible. From my experience, while I was desperate for someone to tell me the answers, I also know that it didn't matter WHAT someone told me, it didn't FEEL like the answer to me! So I know that she needs to find the answer in herself, and I will be there to listen and support her in whatever she does.
Sometimes it is difficult not to tell someone what they 'should' do, though!
By the time she left it was after 10, and I was wiped out, so I knew the workout was not going to happen. I tried to get to bed ASAP, but it was still 11:15 by the time I made lunch for today, got my clothes out and ready, and prepared some other stuff for today. Blah.
And my alarm rang far too early today! I'm feeling dragged out. I've GOT to get back to the gym! I've been doing yoga nearly every day (20-40 minutes a day), but it just isn't enough. It helps my back feel much better, but I really do calm down and feel better when I spend a bunch of time on the elliptical machine several times a week.
Off to buy a tiny birthday cake for Mike and to make dinner. Busy evening ahead!
Another busy training day for me - I was taking calls and learned a lot. Not a bad job, considering! A guy in the office asked me if I wanted to go out for a drink after work. Don't know WHAT I'm doing these days, but suddenly the men are flocking around! How fun!
Last night I made a stew from lamb, onions, and sweet potatoes. Threw some garlic powder and salt in there, and it was a delicious stew-like dish. So yummy, and perfect for a cold rainy night. Anne, my best friend, came over, and we ditched the idea of leaving the bldg to run any errands. We hung out at my place and then went downstairs to her place and continued our chat. (BTW, it is SO fun to have my best friend living in the same building!) I did get to bed earlier last night, but it was still 11:30 by the time I showered and got to bed. But I was much more awake today than I have been other days, and that is why I have to give myself a curfew.
Tonight I'm going to work out, eat my leftover stew, and get to bed. I was supposed to help my neighbor Mike celebrate his birthday tomorrow evening, but it looks like that plan may have changed because he's got something going on. I think we're moving from being 'friends and neighbors' to 'seeing each other'. Anne thinks he is utterly charming and handsome, so I think I'll go with the flow on this and see what happens! It would be TOO funny to have both my best friend and a boyfriend in the building - but I can also see potential issues with me needing my space and setting boundaries. I need to make some rules clear to him to avoid problems later.
Food-wise today was good. Banana-pineapple juice-egg protein powder smoothie for breakfast, a small snack of wheat-free cookies mid-morning, lamb chops (that were incredible) for lunch with a spinach salad on the side, and a luna bar for an afternoon snack. I need to figure out some other options for snacks. I'd like to find something that isn't meaty, but still has a fair amount of protein, and preferably is sugar-free. Pumpkin seeds are a favorite of mine, but sometimes they just don't cut it. Any suggestions would be welcome, so don't hesitate to contact me if you have any! I do also like to eat blueberries or cherries for a snack, so maybe that's what I'll have to make myself do for my fruit portions for the day....
Time for dinner, and a workout, and sleep, definitely not in that order!
I ran a couple errands after work, and as I was walking across the parking lot at the mall, I nearly got hit by a car. She was in a Jeep Cherokee, and it was dark and raining, and I was wearing charcoal grey pants and a black sweater. She may have scared ME half to death, but she was just as scared! Fortunately, she saw me in time, and I had danced/run out of the way by then, too. My heart was still pounding about 30 minutes after it happened. Whew. Too close for comfort for me!
The good news today is that I actually bought a pair of pants in a size EIGHT. Now, I'm 5'10", and until a few years ago I was always a 12/14. The last couple years I've been a pretty solid 10 and sometimes a 12, and peaked last year at a 12 again after breaking my leg. I've been working out lots these last few months, and weigh pretty much what I've weighed most of the last few years, but I'm also much fitter than I've been in the last few years. I tried on this pair of pants knowing that they were an 8 and figuring they would be a bit tight - I'd've tried a 10, but there wasn't one. I was shocked when the 8s not only fit me, but looked good!
I'm still exhausted from working - and not getting to bed early enough. I hope to be in bed at a reasonable hour tonight, so I'm working toward that goal now!
Off to make dinner and maybe run an errand with my best friend, then off to bed!